#there is probably more things i love about winter im forgetting here. but no matter! i will remember next winter im sure :] | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

chocominnie · 4 years ago

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One Last Time 01 — Pjm. (M)

⇢ pairing: Jimin X Reader

⇢ Genre: Idol!Jimin, Exbf!Jimin, model!reader, sad au, fluff, tons of smut, angst

⇢ Synopsis: Your idol ex boyfriend Jimin cheated on you. You two have been broken up for a while now and the media has been keeping track of you and him. You’re trying to get over him, but the things that happen inbetween makes you re-think the entire breakup, and so does Jimin…

⇢ Song : xxxxx

⇢ Word Count : 4.3k

⇢ Warnings: dominant jimin, makeout sessions, this is honestly a sad angsty au, cheating, pregnancy, unprotected and protected sex, a bunch of sex, no really a LOT of sexual themes too, I know I’m forgetting some but sorry in advance!

⇢ Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken

⇢ Authors note: This is my mini series for the summer! Get your tissues, things to take your anger out on, and sit back and watch the drama unfold. Shall we begin?

The winter’s coldness is hardly enough for you to bear. Even though it’s just the beginning, Seoul is known to just go from season to season without a fucking warning. Not only that, but the first snowfall is going to come soon. The weatherman has been talking about it non-stop for the past few days. It’s going to be a brutal one he says but he says that every year so why believe?

Turning off your alarm, you take a few minutes to collect yourself and stretch. Barely any sleep once again but that’s an everyday thing now.. without Jimin. It’s been some rough months not having his body wrapped snugly onto yours. These days you long for his touch, but completely dread at the same time for very good reasons.

Your kitten greets you with small licks on your thigh in which in return you pet her head softly with a smile.

‘‘ At least I still have you babygirl. You keep me company. “ You coo softly while grabbing your phone off the charger. Texts from your best-friend just spamming you with love and apparently she’s coming over. Great. That’s normal. But one text catches your eye. Jeon Jungkook.

You furrow your eyebrows as your finger slides to open it after typing in your password. In relief, he’s just checking up on you as always. Rolling your eyes, you muster enough strength to actually pull yourself out of bed. The cold tiles hit your feet like icicles. You jump from from foot to foot cursing yourself for not turning on the floor heaters as you walk out the room. Clara, your kitten, follows you out purring nonchalantly with a few meows here and there.

‘’ Alright Clara I hear you. Im getting your food now.’’ You chuckle, grabbing her food from the bottom kitchen cabinet right under the sink and pour her half a cup of cat food and a whole bowl of water.

After snacking on your morning granola bar you prepare yourself for your morning routine. Shower, brush teeth, skin care, get dressed, clean. Your phone dings once more just before stripping yourself of your clothes. You don’t bother to look it’s probably just a social media notification.

Drying your hair with a towel as you get out the steaming hot shower, you head straight for the mirror. Dark circles remain under your eyes from months of barely any sleep. You sigh, and gently rub under them. Jimin is the cause of this. Why would he do this to you. Surely enough he would not like to see you like this at all. The worriedness he would have over you is huge. But he has moved on and you just have to accept it no matter how in-love you still are with him.

As you clean up around the living room, another ding from your phone occurs. A groan escapes your lips as you place the pillows back as they should be. In hopes of it just being your manager giving you some good news, you let out a sigh and plop yourself down on the grey suede couch. Three new messages. Jeon Jungkook, who has text you twice, and Ryan your bestfriend.

‘‘ Damn it Ryan why must you consistently text me twenty four sev- “

“ Beause I need to know if you’re okay.”

You jump and drop your phone onto the hardwood floor from the voice that comes from around you.

“ Holy fucking shit you scared me! “ You whine, turning around to face your best-friend. She smiles and holds out her arms for a hug. You roll your eyes and open yours waiting for her embrace.

“ Oh i’ve missed you so so so so so so so-”

“ You just seen me yesterday..” Your voice sarcastic and bland as you let go of her. You sit on the couch first followed by Ryan sitting right next to you.

She looks good today, the navy blue coat she has on suits her very well. Although, you cannot figure out why she decided to wear leggings today. It’s going to rain a bit later but you disregard that seeing as though she’s the fashion deisgner and not you.

You. The model and seemingly ex girlfriend of one of the biggest solo idol in the world right now. Thats what they call you in the news, headlines in magazines, and real life as if you don’t have a real name and just was his acessory. Your modeling career had taken off way before dating him. The world, or Seoul to say the most, didn’t acklowledge you to that point yet.

“ Okay but still. You know we should be roomates. It’ll be easier for me to watch over you. “

Your head turns towards her quickly shaking no, “ I don’t need to be looked over im 20 years old.”

Silence takes place for the next few seconds. You know what she’s going to say next but pray she doesn’t. Those words will just make you even more upset. It’s already enough you have that constant reminder in your head.

You watch her fiddle with the rings on her index and pinky fingers. “ But you know… you haven’t been the same since you and Jimi-”

“ Don’t fucking say it. I don’t want to hear it.”

She sighs harshly and stands up, “ Im just worried about you Yn”

“ Don’t be. Im fine. “ That lie escaped your tongue way too easily.

Truthfully you haven’t and won’t be fine. Everyday there is something new about that girl and Jimin on twitter. Gossip pages, twitter fanpages, and online entertainment pages just always talking about them. They did this, they did that today. Oh we caught them going to this and that restaurant. That used to be you and him.. but now everyone has forgotten about you and focused on them.

Ever since you’ve told reporters and paparazzi repeatedly that you will not be holding or going to any interview they just stopped. A few calls here and there to your manager about scheduling one but she knew you didn’t want to do them so every request is denied. Although its been a year and some change, they still seem to want your side and your opinion to weigh in on. I guess that’s what happens when you date an Idol.

“ The door.. Y/N the door somebody is at the door.” Ryan says, tapping you over and over. You shake your head interrupting your thoughts for the time being. A few more knocks come through.

Finally up onto your feet you harshly walk to the door with each step making noise. It’s to early in the morning for someone to actually be knocking at the door right now. Whoever it is better be dropping off some sort of package, or they’ll surely get a piece of your mind.

Your frail hands grab onto the doorknob and swing it open. Your eyes almost pop through your sockets. How? How did he know you were here? You certainly did not tell him your knew address.

There he stands, his tall frame looking down on you. Lips formed into a tiny pout along with his eyebrows scrunched slightly. His brown eyes forming an ungodly stare into yours with his specs on.

“ Yn! Do you know how worried I was about you? Why did you not answer my messa-”

“Jungkook how do you know where I live?” You pace your hands on your hips, raising an eyebrow at him. To your knowledge, you never gave Jungkook your new apartment address.

Jungkook swallows slowly and puts on his best innocent face on. Oh please like that would work in this moment right now. The only person who has this address is Ryan because she’s the one who helped you move. Even if you had the choice of not giving it out to Ryan you would of but you couldn’t do that to her. She would of been so upset.

Ryan’s voice blares in the background full of excitement. Here we fucking go. “Jungkook! Come in Come in.”

“ Ryan says I could come in.” He says quickly, brushing past you and removing his shoes.

You heavily sigh and slam the door shut. What is this a family reunion? On your way back to the couch you notice them laughing and giggling like two five year old children. They don’t even notice you when you sit right across from them.

You study their expressions. Their chemistry is something so strong. The way their eyes light up when they meet, the way that Jungkook smiles and scrunches his nose more often when she’s around. You miss that. You miss doing that.

“ So are you both coming along this afternoon?”

Your attention focuses back on them. Of course you weren’t paying attention once again.

Your eyes slowly meet with theirs, “ Huh? Where are we going?”

“ Kookie finally bought a house! He wants us to come tonight for chicken and beer. You’re coming right?”

A sharp pain goes through your heart. If the both you you guys go then theirs a possibility that Jimin was invited too. After all, that is his brother. If Jimin comes then he’s most likely going to bring Isabel. A recipe for disaster. Your poor heart, that most likely could not bare the sight of them infront of you, would shatter into a million pieces.

Jungkook’s expression is ready to burst into happiness or to turn into a pout awaiting for your answer. If you let him down he’ll surely be mad at you. But putting yourself before him this time would be the right thing to do right?

“ Listen Jungkook I.. don’t think I can go.” You start off, playing with your hair with your head down.

“ I’ll space you two apart.”

Your face automatically lifts itself up in shock. Somehow, that little confirmation of Jimin being there, gave you some hope. Hope for what though?

“ Wha-what do you mean?”

Jungkook sighs heavily with his hand going up to his brown hair running it through lightly. “ I’ll make sure you two are distanced apart. You don’t want to come because of Jimin but I’ll make sure I’ll invite more people to keep you company and away from him. Okay?”

“ Please Yn. I’ll be there too.” Ryan begs, laying her head on Jungkook’s shoulder. Jungkook smiles a little, caressing her cheek with his other hand upon waiting your response.

Weird. When did they get so close?

The first thing you want to say is that you really could not go. But they already know the excuse now. You might as well just give in.

‘‘ Fine. What time tonight? “

Skincare and makeup products are scattered everywhere on your vanity. You needed the perfect look for tonight that says ‘Yes im doing fine without you’, but in reality you’re doing worse. This is the night where you’ll actually see him. Damn it’s been a while.

After you apply your highlight you step back and take a look at yourself. Not bad at all. You smile to yourself and start cleaning up the mess of products you had distributed across the vanity. A new text appears on you phone as soon as you gather everything up and put it back in it’s place. Grabbing your phone, it’s Ryan giving you the address to Jungkook’s new house.

You sigh and mentally prepare yourself, ‘‘ Okay Yn. You can do this. It’s just one night of conversing among people. Who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone new.”

Before heading out you grab your coat and scarf. Clara follows you all the way to the door letting out her little meows once again. You bend down to pet her head lightly with a smile. “ Clara im coming back. I’ve put food in your bowl babygirl.”

She purrs under your touch then walks away to settle herself in her bed. You take one last final look at your decent sized apartment before heading out.

The subway ride was agonizing pain for you due to it being 30 minutes long. Well, at-least you can ride the subway now. Your mind wouldn’t even of thought of that when you were with him. Everybody would have noticed you and bombard you with questions.

The outskirts of Seoul is peaceful and quite. Not many people live over here. Mostly famous actors and idols. The taxi takes a few minutes to get to the fairly clean subway station. Once you’re inside you take a good look at the driver who seems to be eyeing you in suspicion. You pull out your phone and read the words to the address exactly to him. The taxi man pulls of into the empty streets of god knows where.

All it took was a ten minute ride and then you’re there. The taxi man pulls up to a security guard booth. Just beyond the gates is more street but by squinting your eyes you can make out just a few newly built houses.

‘‘ Who are you here to see?” The taxi driver says.

“ Jeon Jungkook.?

The driver talks to the man for a few seconds before you see the security guard pick up a phone and start dialing. The security is extremely uptight, thats good. After a few moments of speaking the security guard finally opens the gates to be let through.

As you pull up to the house you’re automatically mesmerized on how big and beautiful it is. There’s fresh bushes and some white roses growing in the front of it complementing the white modern style home. The roundabout is full of luxurious cars, in which might be all the other guests.

‘‘ 10 dollars’‘ He says. You give him the ten, thank him, and grab your purse, closing the door behind you.

Your eyes meet face to face with the expensive house. Behind you is the tire wheels backing up and running off back down the roundabout. The time on your watch reads 8:15. Only fifteen minutes late, not bad right?

With each step you take fear quivers inside of you. What if he opens the door? What if that girl opens it instead? The wind blows harsh-fully hitting your cheeks making them turn slightly colored. You raise a small, shaky fist to knock on the door. Your blood turning cold, and face turning pale already. Your anxiety already taking its place inside of your body.

The door swings open revealing Ryan smiling from ear to ear. She pulls you inside without even a greeting. You kick your shoes off in a hurry as she pulls you more and more inside. Scanning the area around you, its a nice huge place. First the both of you pass the entrance, then the chef sized kitchen, which then leads you to the spacious living room where everybody seems to be sitting.

All eyes are on you now with some familiar faces and some not. They smile and greet you one by one and you slightly bow your head with a fake smile.

‘‘ Ah Yn, nice to see you again huh.’‘ Hoseok, the smiley one says, getting up from his seat to greet you once more.

‘‘ Nice to see you to Hoseok. Is Chae-Yeon here? I’ve baked the cookies she likes.’’ You say, holding up the big tuba-wear of freshly baked cookies. Nobody can resist those.

‘‘ No she had to work sadly, but I will enjoy them for her.’‘ He chuckles, bringing the tuba-wear out of your dainty, cold hands.

A very familiar voice booms from behind you causing you to turn around. “ Yn! You actually did come!’’ Jungkook, the owner of the voice exclaims. He wipes his hands with a napkin just before pulling you into a hug.You pat his back just before letting go.

Ryan smiles and shakes her head, “ I told you she would come.’’

Only one hour and 30 minutes into the festivities and half of the people here are drunk or nearly there. You on the other hand do not drink at all. Staying sober throughout this whole party is a must. Who knows what would happen if you start drinking and saying things.Ryan seems to be doing good with Jungkook who’s laying on the floor laughing and cracking jokes with her head laying on his stomach giggling along with him. The others have casually invited themselves into the guest game-room to play some pool.

You just sit there on the couch, munching on a cookie and smiling and laughing here and there at one of Seokjin and Jungkook’s back-to-back jokes that seem to never leave the air.

Only for a knock on the door to interrupt their flow of jokes.

‘‘ I got it I got it.” Seokjin stammers, placing a beer bottle down and stumbling towards the door. You freeze, face turning pale once more. It’s them. It could be them. Your teeth find their way to your lips and you begin to chew on it excessively.

Ryan notices it and automatically gets up from Jungkook, ‘‘ Come Yn, lets go see if the game of pool is interesting.’‘

You nod your head slightly as you get up from the couch. What are you worrying for? You look extravagant tonight. No need to worry yourself.

Just before taking your first few steps you stop, that voice. That oh so familiar voice begins to inch closer and closer. The famous laugh that he always tries to stifle by putting his hand over his mouth, that you’ve always thought was so fucking cute, fills the air.

You don’t know what got over you, but you sit back down dragging Ryan down with you. “ Yn? What are you doing I thought you wanted to avoid him.’’

‘’ No it’s okay. Im going to be fine.’‘ You say, awaiting upon his arrival into the room.

The footsteps are haunting you with each step they take.

one..two..three..four..five..si-

‘‘ Everyone, Isabel and Jimin are here.’‘ Seokjin stammers, smiling wide clearly drunk from all the beer consumed.

Your eyes go directly towards his. The pit of your stomach flutters with nervousness as you hold the long stare with him. His facial expression shocked but not showing it at all. His partner, who’s arm is linked with his, smiles brightly at everyone bowing her head slightly to them including you.

‘‘ Sorry we are late. Jimin didn’t want to come out of his home studio but I’ve made him come along with me.’‘ Her voice gentle and soft.

‘‘ Yn I forgot let me show you my new painting i have received.” Jungkook says quickly, trying to escape you from the awkwardness.You can bare it though its not as bad as you thought.

‘‘ Maybe later Kookie. I’m going to grab some juice.” You say, getting up from your spot. You brush past Jimin lightly with Ryan tailing along with you.

The spacious kitchen was perfect for you to escape for just a moment. Silence is golden. Ryan sighs, pouring you and her a glass of juice. Nothing is to be said yet. But you know she really wants to have her input.

Raising the glass to your lips, you take a sip letting the tanginess run across your tongue and down your throat. ‘’ Say it Ryan.’’

She puts her cup down and looks at you with your eyebrows furrowed, ‘’ You aren’t fine. Please just avoid them for the night.’’

You knew it was coming but you have to face the fact that they area couple anyways so why avoid it? Maybe your mind will finally accept it to see it in person.

‘‘ I have to face it one way or another so why not now?’‘

She shakes her head in disapproval, finishing the rest of her juice. “ No you don’t. You’re making yourself suffer and I don’t like it.’’

‘‘ Yn.. did you make these cookies?’‘ A voice says behind you. Ryan’s eyes go wide and then looks at you signaling for you to not turn around. But you do it anyways.

Isabel. How dare she call you by a pet name? You don’t even know her like that and she’s doing this. Anger wants to get the best of you but you remain humble and calm.

‘‘ Yes. Is there a problem though? Are they not good?’‘ You say, putting on your best innocent act.

She smiles as she moves a piece of hair of her perfectly framed face, ‘’ No they are great! I was wondering if i can have the recipe.. for Jimin’s purpose of course.’’

You breathe through your nostrils with your eyes closed. She knows what she’s doing. She likes seeing you suffer huh? ‘’ You can follow any recipe online. I just add almond extract and substitute white sugar for brown.’’

Ryan shakes her head slightly while sticking her cup into the sink. ‘’ I’m going to be back I have to use the restroom.’’

Once she leaves Isabel’s smile drops.’’ Almond? Im- Im allergic!” She says, semi yelling at you. You’re shocked more or so at the sudden outburst that you can’t speak. You had zero knowledge of her being allergic, it’s an accident for sure.

“You did this on purpose!’’ She says, tears filling her eyes as she goes into a coughing fit.

Shit. You didn’t know if anyone was allergic to nuts here but you had put it in anyways because that was the secret ingredient

‘’ I- I didn’t know im sorry is there anything I can do?’’ You say, guilt taking over you while you rush to her side patting her back.

‘‘ Get off of me! You did this on purpose! You never liked me anyways. Jimin! Jimin!‘ She scream’s, coughing and wheezing making her face red.

Multiple footsteps rush into the kitchen. You don’t know what to do at this point so you just back away and let whoever take over. All the commotion going on and yelling is starting to give you a slight headache. All of the boys surround her, bombarding with questions and asking each other what to do.

‘‘ What’s all the yelling about? What happened! “ Jungkook exclaims rushing towards her hunched over body.

‘‘ What’s going on? “ That voice that haunts you everynight finally comes inside the kitchen. When he see’s Isabel he automatically rushes towards her side. It pains you to see him rush to another woman’s body. But that figure is no longer yours so he has every right to do that.

‘‘ She-She put almond in the cookies on purpose! She’s trying to–to-’‘ She manages to wheeze out before another coughing fit.

Jimin’s eyes meet yours full of rage but then taken over by concern. He knows your hurt. Still hurt from the past and from this very situation now. You don’t manage to keep eye contact, so the floor is your eyes’ bestfriend right now.

‘‘ Yn. is this true? Why would you do that?” He says, eyes never leaving yours and voice soft.

You shake your head quickly, “ I didn’t know she was allergic. I always put almond extract an-’’

“ You knew better than to put any type or form of nut in a dish when bringing it to ones house. You never know if someone has an allergy to it.’‘ Jungkook scolds you, eyes furrowed in shame.

‘‘ Don’t blame her. She didn’t fucking know.” Ryan’s voice enters the room in madness. She comes to your side with her arms crossed. Your own personal savior. Without her, you’d still be feeling guilty and taking the blame.

‘‘ Besides, you knew better than to invite him if you knew he was going to bring the girl he cheated on her with.. right?’‘ She says, cocking her head to the side as her attitude takes over.

The room is silent again. Good girl Ryan.

Isabel lifts her head in disbelief along with Jimin. “ Listen that’s beside the point. Just don’t do it again.” Jimin says, focusing his attention back on Isabel. He reaches into her purse to grab her Epi-pen.

His scolding is enough to send your eyes into tears. You shouldn’t of agreed to come. This is a disaster. You take the tuba-wear of cookies from the counter on your way out of the kitchen and dispose of them. Your vision is blurry and you don’t know where your going but you just need some air. You make lefts and rights down long and short hallways till you reach a room that has a balcony.

You slip on who-ever’s house slippers and open the sliding door revealing the winter’s cold harsh air. You lean on the railing and close your eyes breathe in and out heavily.

Wiping the tears away, You open our eyes and look straight ahead. The whole city is lit up such a beautiful view for a sad moment. The sad moment is cut short by the sliding door opening and closing. You don’t bother to turn around it’s probably just Ryan checking on you again. When are people going to stop doing that?

“ Yn.”

Thats the last voice you wanted to hear.

‘‘ Are you happy? Happy for scolding me infront of everybody.” You sniffle, wiping away your leaking nose.

You hear some rustling before something is placed on your shoulders. You look down at the material and shrug it off of you.

‘‘ Give it to your girlfriend.”

‘‘ I can’t let you be cold. Put it back on.’‘ He sighs, picking it back up and coming closer to you. You both stand side by side. Jimin puts his jacket around you once more and before you could re-do your action just before, he speaks.

‘‘ Shrug it off again and I’ll scold you. Do you understand?’‘ He says firmly.

You don’t bother to speak. Silence is golden.

‘‘ Listen.. i know you still aren’t over the fact that we are through but-”

‘‘ Shut up. I don’t want to hear it. Please go tend to your dying girlfriend.’‘ You say, sarcastically.

He huffs, “ She’s resting right now. She wouldn’t have to be if you wouldn’t of put-’’

You turn towards him slowly and meet his eyes daring for him to finish the rest of his sentence. ‘’ Don’t you fucking dare Park Jimin.’’

‘‘ Honorifics.’‘ He says, slightly looking down at you due to the height difference.

‘‘ You’re right Jimin-ssi.’‘

Jimin’s expression is taken a-back. You knew that one honorific word would hurt him.

‘‘ If we are done speaking I will take my leave now.” You say, eyes never leaving his as you take off his jacket and toss it to him, leaving him outside in the cold

This night was one of your worst mistakes. You thought you could handle it, but couldn’t. So maybe Ryan and Jungkook were right. Maybe you can’t handle it at all..

589 notes · View notes

katronautt · 3 years ago

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KAT'S YEAR REVIEW & A THANK YOU NOTE

hello my lovelies! we reached the end of this year (thank god) and i have a few things to say and a lot to thank for you guys.

(i promise that the rest of my writing is not in this font lol)

this year sucked. bigtime. everyone was all over 2020, how bad it was and all but lemme tell you, 2021 wasn't that much better either. first half of this year was spent with struggling trying to find a job while spiraling down into the rabbit hole of self-pity and depression. finally in may (after 8 months of searching), i got accepted to a place that wasn't (and isn't) any better than what I had left behind in 2020. still, it is somewhat better and i least i have a monthly income for now.

but i still very much like to move on to something else in 2022 so here is the first thing im hoping for next year: a good job with a good salary, something i enjoy doing. (huh good luck you dumb biatch lol)

so all in all, i hated this year but!! there are a few things that made is somewhat bareable and it is all thanks to you guys! (here comes the soppy part so buckle up)

i (re)discovered the world of fanfiction throughout the pedro fandom sometime in november, 2020. i have all that time in my hands since i didnt have a job and i got really into it. ever since then, i find it hard at nights to go to sleep without reading anything before it (kinda became a tradition of mine if you will) and during the winter, reading fanfics helped me tremendously. they helped me escape from my miserable, jobless, futureless and lonely af life and they helped me get through the day. they brought me joy, sometimes tears in a good way and i caught myself staying up til 2 or 3 just to read "one more" chapter of a certain fic.

i still cant believe you guys are doing this for free, for our entertainment (and yours) ! sharing your wonderful works with us and expecting nothing in return (except for the obviously well deserved likes & reblogs) is truly a wonder i never be able to comprehend!

tumblr is truly a hellsite, it gave me so much anxiety since i joined back in actively yet... tumblr is also that thing that gave me the most joy this year with y'all in it.

and now for the thank you notes:

⭐ yes of course im starting with my dearest, my love, my one braincell, @queenofthefaceless. ari, you were one of the first 'big' blogs that started following me after i started making gifs again and i was all over and back and that support still holds up til today. thank you for your neverending support and for always being there for me, no matter what. ilysm. 💜

⭐ although we dont speak much lately, @keethus-arts I ll never forget your support and nice words whenever i was feeling down. thank you keeth! 💜

⭐ when @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa started following me, i was just about to go to bed around 2 am, but when i saw the notification i got so excited that i couldnt sleep for another half an hour and then the next morning i checked in there again to see if i wasnt dreaming. for a while i was intimidated by Katryn for some stupid reason (you know big blog with amazing and popular fics and all) but honestly she's the absolute sweetest and I'm so glad I got to meet you! You have such amazing & wonderful stories! i also wanna thank you for your infinite support towards my maxie gifs and towards my other works too💜

⭐ the same happened with @qveenbvtch, i was (and am) so in love with her javi series, i never thought that such a big and amazing (and intimidating) writer would ever talk to me, let alone follow me but she is also one of the sweetest person i've ever met here and i hope she is doing alright and having a nice holidays wherever she is right now 💜

⭐ @mandocrasis birdie, you know this by now but i found you and your blog through your mind blowing fic interruption which is probably something i will never shut up about, but through that smutty one piece i got to meet a wonderful person with wonderful stories & i thank you for your never fading support towards me and my gifs 💜

⭐ @asta-lily lil beans, although you are not that active anymore on tumblr (which i hope will change one day), you were one of the first people i became mutuals with and i was lucky enough too meet the sweetest, loveliest person in you. and your AOJ story forever remains dear to my heart 💜

⭐ sweet, sweet @anaaaispunk ! the first thing i read from you was the first chapter of your crazy in love series (during my summer holiday, on a beach, with people all around me... ) i was instantly blown away and sweating (and not just from the hot wheater 🤭), I just knew I had to follow you for more haha. but this way I got to meet another sweet soul of tumblr with an amazing writing talent. thank you for all the love and support you have shown towards me and my gifs 💜

⭐ MEG! i feel like i am so lucky for finding your soft max lord series, it seriously changed my life, i fell in love with the story, with max, the whole thing.. and when you dedicated your latest chapter to me with that sweet note, i felt like i could cry, because honestly, one of the best thing that happened to me lately haha. you are an absolute angel and dont you forget that @perropascal !! 💜

⭐ and i also wanna mention and say thanks to @babydarkstar! Your ezra story had blown me the fuck away, seriously, its amazing, wonderful and beautiful.. just like you anya, thank you for support and your amazingness! 💜

Alrighty, i talk way too fucking much so im just gonna tag the rest of y'all to whom i say a massive thanks because without your amazing fics i dont think i would have survived this year ( i know with some of you we are not mutuals but that doesnt stop me from loving your works):

@absurdthirst, @toomanystoriessolittletime, @storiesofthefandomlovers, @honestly-shite, @littlemisspascal, @radiowallet, @queridopascal, @just-here-for-the-moment, @softpedropascal , @javier-pena, @f0rever15elf, @danidrabbles, @lellowberry, @pedro-pascal-love, @foli-vora, @krissology @frannyzooey, @starlightmornings, @wordsnwhiskey, @juletheghoul, @dincrypt, @mandosmistress, @yespolkadotkitty, @songsformonkeys, @the-ginger-hedge-witch, @astroboots, @brandyllyn, @charnelhouse , @ezrasbirdie , @novemberrain221, @oonajaeadira

And to every other lovely mutuals I am lucky enough to have: without your support I'd be nowhere. Love y'all tremendously 💋❤️❤️

@beskarboobs, @300mirrors, @over300books, @artsymaddie, @phantomviola, @djarsdin, @sirtadcooper , @lucrezia-thoughts, @wild-at-heart-kept-in-cage

Here's to another shitty AMAZING year with you guys on this hellsite!! 🥂🎉❤️❤️❤️❤️

#kat stuff #soppy post #pls excuse me while I cry in the corner from all the memories that started flooding back #happy new year 🥂💞#I hope I didn't miss out anyone

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jackrrabbit · 5 years ago

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Sleepless /// Tanjiro x f!reader (18+)

Request: Hi!! I'm not entirely sure on how to request since this is my first time EVER requesting something here on tumblr 😳😳 so im not sure if im doing this right,,,but um,,,,could you do a soft dom! tanjiro kamado x reader nsfw??? (he's aged up of course)

A/N: Y’all I’ve been working on this practically since I made this gd blog…idk why it took so long since I LOVE the concept. Reader is a traumatized bby who just needs her kitty licked ✊😔 and honestly same

Tags/warnings: soft dom, daddy vibes but without the ‘daddy’ (onii-chan vibes?), brief mentions of past demon violence & PTSD, fluff?, historical inaccuracies probably, reader is implied to be inexperienced, mild overstimulation, lowkey yandere lowkey romantic who knows, all characters are adults

It starts out with little things. Harmless things. Tanjiro sees you barely ate anything at dinner, and later that night he comes to your bedroom with a plate of food for you. “You should eat,” he tells you.

“I’m not hungry,” you say, almost a little petulantly. The food looks good and you know he’s trying to be nice, but you’re not a child. You can take care of yourself, and even when you can’t it’s not his job to do it for you.

“Eat,” he says again softly. It’s not a command. It’s like he already knows you’re going to eat, and he’s just patiently waiting for you to give in.

You pick up the chopsticks and eat the food he prepared for you. All of it. Tanjiro sits there and watches and then when you’re done, he smiles at you and pats your head and takes the plate away. You think it’s weird, but the next morning you don’t question it. He’s a big brother to everyone—doesn’t it make sense that he would want to make sure you’re eating enough?

He probably can’t help it.

You decide you’re going to let it slide, until a few days later after breakfast with him and the others when Tanjiro pulls you aside and holds your face in his hands and tells you you’re looking a little tired lately—are you getting enough sleep?

The truth is that you aren’t. You want to deny it, but somehow you have a hard time lying to him. “I used to sleep with my siblings in our bed, so it’s hard to fall asleep since…” since the demon who made you an orphan murdered them. “And, you know. Nightmares.”

Tanjiro understands. Of course he understands! He used to have five younger siblings, did you know that? Now Nezuko has her own room and the rest…well, you’ve heard the story. It’s hard to fall asleep when you’re by yourself, isn’t it? He’s been there.

“How many hours are you sleeping every night? On average?”

You’re trying too hard to ignore the brush of his callused fingertips over your cheekbones, so you tell him the truth without meaning to. “Um, like four hours? On a good day?”

His eyes go wide and suddenly both of his hands are wrapped around one of yours and squeezing, maybe a little too tight. “Is that the truth, (Y/N)? Four hours is too little. Sleep deprivation isn’t good for you.”

“I know, but—”

“No. The next time you have trouble getting to sleep, I want you to come to my room.” You open your mouth to mount a denial, but he frowns and cuts you off. “Promise me. Okay? It’s really bad for your health, so promise.”

And once again, you say yes even though you don’t want to.

It’s fine. It’ll be fine, you think. You’ll just pretend you’re sleeping better. Tonight you’ll lay in bed with your eyes open and stare at the ceiling and try to listen to your own breathing, in and out and in and out, and hope it drowns out the memories that stick fast in your head whenever you’re by yourself. Then when you’ve been laying in the dark for a few hours, you’ll finally fall asleep and all your nightmares will play out in technicolor and you’ll do your best to be quiet so you don’t wake anyone else up and in the morning you’ll splash cold water on your face to make your eyes less puffy and pinch your cheeks to get some color in them and it’ll be fine.

You can take care of yourself. You have to, since everyone else is gone. So you’re not sure why, when the sun goes down and you’re looking into the face of another sleepless night, you find yourself knocking on the door of Tanjiro’s bedroom.

Maybe it’s just that he made you promise. You hate breaking your promises.

He lets you in, the half-asleep affect mixing with the same caring, serene look as always (and it’s a little insulting that he’s not surprised at all). Tanjiro sits on the bed first and you can’t help staring at him in the flickering orange lamplight. He’s more muscular than you remembered, and taller than when you first met. He can play the role of a big brother all he likes, but he’s still an adult. A man. And he’s not family.

“I don’t know if this is a good idea,” you say, fidgeting with the sleeve of your shirt.

“It’s okay, (Y/N),” Tanjiro murmurs as he lies down, his voice still scratchy with sleep. Somehow it relaxes you. He just has that way about him—when he says it’s okay, it feels okay.

Tanjiro pats the spot on the bed next to him. It looks really warm, and there’s a winter chill in the air even though it’s only September. It’s a bed made for one person, but Tanjiro—ever considerate—has moved over to one side to make space for you.

“Come on. Come sleep,” he instructs in that soft, non-demanding way of his. So you sit down on the edge of the bed and (carefully, carefully, like you’re making your way into a hot bath) fold your legs and pull the covers over you so you’re lying next to him. The bed is even warmer than you thought it’d be. Tanjiro radiates heat—he’s so warm, you think, how fitting—and then before you know it you’re drifting into the first dreamless sleep you’ve been afforded in a very long time.

That first night, you sleep with a good six inches of space between the two of you. You don’t want to touch him, don’t want to cross that invisible boundary—at first. But it doesn’t matter, because every time you wake up next to him, you’re curled up to his side like a puppy seeking warmth. It’s not like he minds. Judging from the gentle smile on his face when he wakes you up in the morning (and tells you that you should go back to your room before anyone notices you’re not there) he likes it.

Never again, you think. No way. But you haven’t had a good night’s sleep in so long, and it’s nice to be well-rested for once, and the next evening you only lie in your bed for fifteen minutes before you’re knocking on Tanjiro’s door again, silently asking if you can take advantage of his kind nature for just one more night.

He says yes. Of course he does. So you sleep next to Tanjiro again, you keep half a foot of space between you again, and you wake up hugging him. Again. And then you do it the next night, and the next night, sleeping beside Tanjiro over and over until you no longer bother trying to leave room between your body and his.

Is this okay? you wonder sometime around the two-week mark. It’s the longest you’ve gone without having nightmares since the demon came. Sometimes you think you’re betraying your loved ones by trying not to think about their deaths; letting yourself off easy while they suffered. You tell this to Tanjiro while the two of you are lying back to back under his blanket, quietly enough that (you hope) if he’s already sleeping you won’t wake him.

He hears you, and he turns around and lays his arm around your waist. “Don’t be silly…of course they wouldn’t want you to be unhappy.”

“But how do you know?”

“I know.” Tanjiro’s voice is half muffled by your hair, but it’s steady. “You believe me, don’t you.”

You do.

“Don’t think about that anymore.” His hold on your waist gets a little bit tighter, arms a little bit less forgiving.

“I won’t,” you say, hoping that the promise will be enough. The two of you fall asleep like that, and when you wake up in the morning it’s the first time ever that you haven’t moved in the night.

As if it wasn’t enough to be spending every night together, at some point you start to dream about him too. Usually it’ll just be a flash or a snippet that you barely remember once you wake—the reassuring tone of his voice, a smell like a campfire, or a few notes of laughter—but tonight you’re watching him train in the courtyard. In the dream, he moves through his forms with inhuman grace, position to position to position, balanced with perfect agility like he’s a dancer and not a swordsman. With how beautiful it is, you can almost forget the raw power behind his movement, the strength that has subjugated more demons than you care to know.

He pauses to stretch, rolling his shoulders back, and you notice that he’s shirtless (which is how you know it’s a dream). Tanjiro’s arms flex as he raises the blade into position, and the sun shimmers over the thin sheen of sweat on his chest. He looks ethereal like this, and as you sit on the porch and watch him, you feel heat stir inside of you that has nothing to do with the sunlight.

Tanjiro, you call out softly. He looks around to you, deep red eyes resting on yours, and whips the blade down to replace it in its sheath.

Can I come closer? The grass is cool and wet under your bare feet as you pad lightly into the courtyard toward him. You can taste the humid summer air in your mouth. Fingers tangle themselves in your hair, tilting your head up to meet his.

Tanjiro…

“(Y/N)?”

Tanjiro’s voice cuts through the dream and you scrunch your eyes shut, reluctant to leave the dream world where he wants to touch you, not out of pity or because he thinks it’s his duty to take care of you but because he wants to. But it’s too late—his hand is on your shoulder, gently shaking you out of your slumber. “(Y/N)? You said my name.”

“Sorry, I…sorry.”

“What were you dreaming about?”

He kissed you, in your dream. Now that you’re looking at the real version, your cheeks feel warm…and so does that same spot below your belly. Suddenly the room feels uncomfortably hot, and you wish you weren’t trapped under the covers with Tanjiro. You shift your legs to try and get a little more air between the two of you, but the heat persists.

“I think I should go back to my room.” You must be sweating—you feel damp for some reason. He’s too close.

Tanjiro ignores you. “Can you tell me what you were dreaming about?”

“I—you,” you admit. “You were training.”

“And?”

“And…I don’t know. It’s kind of warm in here, isn’t it? I think I’ll just…” You push the cover aside and sit up, but before you can get yourself off the bed, Tanjiro is tugging you back down, holding to the mattress so he can hover over you in that way he likes.

“Tell me,” he says to you, voice as firm as it is gentle. Sleep-mussed locks of red hair flop over his forehead but his face is serious, and you can’t look away.

“You kissed me,” you whisper.

That takes him by surprise. You can tell by the way his eyes widen, but his hold on you doesn’t ease up. You want to die. Why did you say that? He’ll think you’re disgusting, sleeping next to him in his bed and having perverted dreams about him. Why couldn’t you have just lied? Why can’t you ever lie to him?

“I’m going back to my bedroom.” You try to project more confidence than you actually feel, but there’s no use. Tanjiro doesn’t seem like he’s going to let you get away from him any time soon.

He’s straddling your body carefully, one elbow folded next to your head while his other hand comes up to stroke your cheek. “Your face is all red.”

“You’re…you’re too close.”

“I don’t think I’m close enough. You have goosebumps, look...” Tanjiro folds up the sleeve of your sleep shirt, exposing your arms to view. “…here…and here, too…”

His hands are wandering further down to the hem of the shirt, pushing it up so slowly and gently that you’re not even sure it’s happening until you feel him stroking over your belly. It’s true, you do have goosebumps. It feels like every hair on your body is standing on end. “Tanjiro…?”

“I guess you haven’t been able to touch yourself, since we’ve been sleeping together. That kind of repression is bad for your health. Even I’ve been a little…frustrated.”

Your mind has to work overtime to understand what he’s telling you as he strokes over your stomach and onto the sensitive skin of your sides, and then up to the flesh covering your ribs. His thumb teases over the underside of one of your breasts for a second, but the shock must have shown on your face because he retreats immediately.

“I’m not. I’m not frustrated,” you say, knowing he won’t believe you.

Tanjiro shakes his head in dismissal. “I don’t think that’s true, (Y/N).”

What are you supposed to say? Of course it’s not true. But admitting that you’ve been feeling heated around him lately would ruin everything, so refuse to say it. “I…I don’t know what to say…”

“You don’t have to say it. Can I prove it to you?”

What does he mean? Your head jerks up and down in acquiescence. You barely have to wait a moment before Tanjiro’s hands are slipping down your sides to the waistband of your pants and tugging them down over your hips. A tap on your hipbones prompts you to lift your hips and let him remove the clothing, not that you know why you’re complying so blindly.

Just like you always do.

Is he still trying to take care of you? Putting himself in a caretaker’s role because he thinks you need him? This is going a little far, too far maybe, but you can’t deny you want this. The heat of his body is no longer stifling—instead, it feels like it’s pulling you into him.

When your pants are out of the way, Tanjiro reaches into your underwear and dabs against your slit. It’s not until you feel his finger sliding between the puffy lips of your cunt that you realize how wet you are…and of course he can feel it too. Your knees jerk together to try and push him away from you but he’s unfazed, his touch steadily becoming more intrusive as he seeks out the syrupy dampness from your pussy.

“What am I feeling right now? I want you to tell me.”

“You’re—you’re touching me?” you gasp out.

“And you’re all wet. You can’t tell me you haven’t been frustrated when you’re getting this wet with just my fingers.” At this, you feel him prodding deeper into your pussy and stretching you open.

“Nn—okay, fine! Fine!” The words come out of you in a rapid burst, and you finally muster up the resolve to push Tanjiro away from you by his shoulders. “I’ll go back to my room and deal with it, okay? You don’t have to do it for me.”

“I don’t know. I don’t think I can trust you to take care of this problem by yourself. You’ve been lying to me about your needs.”

You wish he wasn’t able to be so calm while you feel like your entire face is on fire. He pulls his hand out of your panties and backs up on the bed so his torso is framed between your legs. “Can you let me help you, (Y/N)? Let me take care of you.”

You lick your lips without realizing you’re doing it, and Tanjiro’s eyes follow the motion. You can barely comprehend what he’s asking. You want it. You want his hands on you; you want to be taken care of in the way he’s offering. But whether or not you can actually ask for it is another story. “Tanjiro…”

“You need this. I know you do.” He skims his palm over your bare thigh in a soothing motion that, oddly enough, puts your barbed nerves a fraction at ease. “I want you to be honest with me about what you need.”

It’s too much. The warmth of his body so tantalizingly close to yours, his shadowed eyes searching yours for a response you don’t know how to give him…and the sticky mess in your panties. Tanjiro’s giving you a free pass to get something you’ve wanted for longer than you can comfortably admit to yourself, and you’re not sure you could deny him if you tried. What can you tell him except the truth? “I want you. I need you.”

“Good girl. See how good it feels to be honest?” Tanjiro bows down and mouths over your pussy through the wet spot on your panties.

It’s not the honesty that feels good, you think as his tongue pads at you through the fabric.

Too impatient to wait another second to taste you, Tanjiro nudges your rear up and slides your panties down your legs. As soon as you kick the undergarment off your feet, he’s pulling your thighs back apart and curling his thickly-muscled arms around them to hold you securely as his head dips back down to your bare pussy. He wastes no time in laving his tongue over your slit and up to the button at the top.

The sensation of this hot, wet muscle pressing up against your most private area is…weird, to say the least. You’ve never felt anything like this—to be honest, you don’t even know exactly what Tanjiro’s doing. When you think about what’s actually happening on this bed—your (friend? partner? bedmate? crush?) ally has his mouth angled between your legs and is licking your pussy—you think you might spontaneously combust. You’ve never felt anything like this before, and however strange the feeling is, you’re more than aware of your hips grinding up toward Tanjiro just so you can feel more of it.

“Here, let me help…” Tanjiro effortlessly lifts you to place a pillow under your lower back, and then moves back down to continue his relentless licking, this time at a new angle that allows him full access to every millimeter of your raw cunt. He’s eating you out like your pussy is the last meal he’ll ever have.

And how can he help it? You taste so good, so sweet on his lips and over his tongue. You must have been in so much pain lying next to him every night with your desire leaking out between your thighs. Just thinking about is making heat rise low in his groin, and his grip on you is getting tighter by the second. How awful that you tried to keep this to yourself…it was remiss of him not to realize before tonight that you needed him so badly.

But it’s going to be alright, because judging from the muffled noises you’re making, every swipe of his tongue licking up your slit is more than making it up to you.

You probably don’t realize how much your hips are wiggling under his minstrations. He barely has to exert any effort to keep you still, but the way you keep trying you push yourself closer to him is enticing, not to mention the way you’re trying (and failing) to keep your voice down through your moans.

“Tanjiro…T-Tanjiro,” you whimper. It’s like you can’t think of anything except for his name. All of your attention is focused on the pressure building up deep in your core, each stroke of his tongue over your clit taking you higher and higher. You feel tense…wound up so tightly that you have to bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from letting the shallow puffs of air turn into full-fledged cries.

Just like that, please, please… You think the words rather than saying them, even though you want to. It’s too humiliating to be begging Tanjiro for more while he’s already giving you more than you deserve, but it’s almost like he heard you anyway, because his tongue writhes down across your clit again and your back arches up off the bedspread.

Your thighs twitch around his head, trying involuntarily to hold him down. He just chuckles and keeps you firmly in place, and his voice hums out over your pussy making feel even more wild. “Please, I’m—I’m cumming…” Your voice trails off and you crush the heels of your palms into your face to cover up your expression while the wave of pleasure hits you so hard you think you might faint.

Tanjiro doesn’t stop. You’re crying out in whimpers so high-pitched he can barely hear them, but he doesn’t stop. The delicate muscles in your pussy are throbbing under his tongue, but he doesn’t stop licking until you’re almost crying, panting out “it’s too much it’s too much, please Tanjiro” and pushing his head away with your hand.

When he finally pulls away, his hair is tangled and disarrayed from where you’ve been running your hands through it, and his mouth and jaw are shining wet. Tanjiro licks his lips and if you didn’t feel shaky before…you do now.

It takes a second for the power of thought to return to you, but when it does you just sigh weakly and flop back down onto the bed. Tanjiro’s next to you before you hit the pillow, and he grips your jaw with one hand to angle your head to meet his, and—

He’s kissing you. He’s actually kissing you. His lips are surprisingly soft over yours, but as usual there’s an unnecessary degree of pressure attached to the contact that has you sinking deeper into your blankets under his force. You can detect the lush, slightly bitter taste of your arousal coating the inside of his mouth as his tongue (skillful as ever) traces over yours. Tanjiro is kissing you, and it’s a hundred times better than any dream you could come up with on your own, so you kiss back.

It takes him a long moment to break the kiss, long enough that your lungs are pleading for air by the end of it. When his lips leave yours, a thin trail of saliva connects the two of you until it breaks and drips down your chin.

“Tanjiro…” You search for the right words, but what are you supposed to say at a time like this? “I…what did we just do?”

“Shh, don’t worry.” Tanjiro leans in again, this time just to press a chaste kiss to your forehead. “I’m going to take good care of you, okay?”

You take a moment and then duck your head into a nod. It doesn’t make any sense—how does he do that?—but once he says it’s okay it always is.

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ootahime · 3 years ago

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what is utahime’s role in the future? — a prediction (manga spoilers)

part 1 (unedited)

I WAS ABOUT TO POST IT BUT I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED IT AND I WAS SO HURT FR!!!!! I HAD REWRITE THIS ENTIRE THING </33

part 2 is here!

in this post, i will be analyzing the information we’ve been given about utahime so far to form a prediction about her future role in the jujutsu kaisen series. if you’re as interested in utahime’s character as i am, please feel free to keep reading :3 (i’ll also be talking about her relationship with gojo a bit too)

soukatsu_ on twt!

kaikaikitan on twt!

utahime iori is a semi-grade 1 sorcerer working as a student supervisor/teacher at kyoto jujutsu high school. she loves drinking beer and going to karaoke. she’s also close friends with shoko and she’s not particularly fond of gojo most of the time. what else do we know about her?

hates sweets (funny she’s the complete opposite of gojo)

she’s great at singing and it’s a huge part of her technique

squabbling with gojo became a reflex :3

everyone absolutely adores utahime

loves watching soccer and baseball

a terrible drunk (worse than naobito zenin)

gojo is her main source of stress

let’s dive into her personality and abilities!

chapter 65

before i get into it, i think it’d be best if i were to explain the timeline because a lot of people seem to be confused about this one particular thing. utahime is born on february 18th, 1987. contrary to popular belief, she is not 3 years older than gojo. it is november 2018 in the story because gojo was sealed on halloween. if gojo was born on december 7th, 1989, that would mean that right now, he is only 28 years old. he has yet to turn 29.

the year is 2007. gojo satoru is a second year at tokyo jujutsu high school. the japanese school year begins in april which suggests that gojo is only 17 at the time (even if it’s not april, it doesn’t look like winter yet so it’s unlikely that he’s already 18). utahime is 20 because it is past february. she is a 2nd grade sorcerer at the age of 20. that’s not bad at all!

chapter 65 introduces young utahime and mei on a mission together within a cursed site. in real time, they’ve been gone for two days which is a cause of concern for gojo, shoko, and geto because the two haven’t contacted anyone since the beginning of their mission. the two begin to suspect something is wrong because the hallway markers they’ve set in place disappeared, and no matter how far they travel within the halls, the end is nowhere in sight. mei theorizes that the cursed spirit is overlapping the space as they travel forward. utahime agrees with this speculation and proposes a plan to escape the cursed spirit’s grasp by moving erratically. notice how she says that if one of them should escape, they can try to attack from the outside or call for help. if utahime was not capable of inflicting damage on anything then she would have told mei to escape and attack if she can while she waited to be rescued. however, she didn’t. she included herself in the sentence which leads me to believe that she is capable of going on the offense if needed.

keep in mind that at this point in time, mei is a grade 1 sorcerer. she is knowledgeable about all things involving jujutsu because she is experienced and skillful. we can see this aspect of her character illustrated when she theorizes that the cursed spirit is messing with the space they’re in. she chooses to go with utahime’s plan because she agrees that it’s the best action moving forward. this verifies that utahime is an intelligent girl that’s able to get along with pretty much anyone.

her intellect is demonstrated once again in chapter 79. she was able to deduce the possibility of there being more than one traitor and the fact that one is probably a higher up. she also narrowed down the mechamaru as the mole of kyoto not because he was acting suspicious but by process of elimination. she thought thoroughly of his technique and how easy it would be for him to manipulate devices small enough to be undetectable.

sure you can argue that she should already know all her students’ abilities and whatnot but you have to admit that it’s hard trying to sniff out the traitor when no one is acting suspicious. in addition to that, how did she know that there was a traitor in the top brass? i would have never guessed that tbh LOL (maybe bc im an idiot).

okay, now that we have established that she’s intelligent, let’s answer a more important question. is utahime weak?

chapter 33

if gojo calls utahime weak, does that mean there is some truth to it? well it is true that she is weaker than him because he’s the strongest and all. in my opinion, he’s just teasing her. he probably found that calling her weak is what really riles her up. maybe i’ll talk about why he loves teasing her so much in a later post. but anyway, gojo calls everybody and their mom weak. he even said jogo was weak and we know how powerful that guy is. gojo’s words alone do not indicate much about utahime’s power. in fact, i don’t even think he has seen her use her technique yet. he’s probably only ever heard of how it works. this is what i think their conversation about her technique was like:

gojo: hm? ur cursed technique is singing? can u show me?

utahime: what! no way!

gojo: why not?

*one of the classmates tells him that she can only use her CT once in a while because it consumes a lot of energy*

gojo: hahaha! u have to conserve cursed energy to use ur CT? why are u so weak, utahime?

utahime: i! am! your! senpai! respect! me!

what i’m trying to say is that gojo loves poking fun of people. we should not believe him when he calls someone weak because compared to him, everyone is weak.

this is a little off topic but let’s examine him telling her, “and you don’t have the nerves, utahime.” i think he’s trying to say that there’s no way she’ll ever do something like that because she’s not the type to put her students in danger. remember the soft expression and relieved smile on her lips when she said that she was glad the students were safe after the kyoto incident? gojo was directly in front of her so not only did he hear her say that, but he could have seen the look on her face too. even if he told her that she didn’t have the guts to betray the school to get on her nerves, he knew that utahime simply cared too much about the students so he ruled her out as a suspect right away. this is why he ultimately decided to confide in her and ask her to help him.

i’m a person who loves over-analyzing things. i really enjoy the dynamic between gojo and utahime. they’ve known each other for more than 11 years and although they always bicker, there is an unspoken feeling of trust between the two. gojo can do anything and everything by himself because he is truly the strongest person alive, but he still knows when to rely on others. him deciding to entrust utahime with such a job implies that he believes in utahime’s abilities.

chapter 52

she’s not using any cursed energy here--not to our knowledge at least. this is just pure skill. she was able to swiftly evade the swing from haruta. he was surprised himself considering the fact that he was right behind her. how do we know her CT isn’t speed? after haruta swung at her, we can see that some of her hair got cut off. if she was using her CT then speed should be her specialty. she should have been able to completely avoid the attack altogether but she didn’t. of course this isn’t a wow moment because jujutsu sorcerers should know how to dodge attacks, however, i’m just trying to get the point across that she’s not a defenseless person without her technique or others. let’s not forget that semi-grade 1 isn’t a weak rank either. you can’t simply be recommended to be a grade 1 sorcerer if you only can support others.

chapter 48

i want to bring up this panel. it suggests that utahime and takuma are sorcerers who have not experienced black flash and therefore, do not understand the essence of cursed energy as well as those who have like gojo and nanami. i find it strange how takuma and utahime were used to represent sorcerers who haven’t experienced it yet. is the purpose to demonstrate that there is a clear difference in skill between adult sorcerers like utahime and takuma compared to gojo and nanami? i could be nitpicking but the order of todo’s statement doesn’t line up with the sorcerers being shown. let me explain in depth. todo starts off by saying, “for those who have experienced black flash as compared to those who have not...” wouldn’t it make more sense to show gojo and nanami on the right side to represent sorcerers who have experienced black flash? that was mentioned first, after all. gojo and nanami should appear when todo says “for those who have experience black flash” while utahime and takuma should be shown right after to personify the second part, “as compared to those who have not.” i’m just making it more complicated than it actually is LOLOL i’m sure it really just means they haven’t experienced black flash yet, which is completely fine. i also find it fascinating how they used utahime to contrast gojo. with nanami and takuma it makes sense. nanami is someone takuma looks up to, he wants to gain nanami’s approval before he deems himself worthy of a promotion. what about utahime and gojo? what’s the purpose of comparing those two together when it’s obvious that gojo knows more about the essence of cursed energy more than anyone else? i might be delusional whoops

----

let me know what you guys think? this is only a part 1 so i haven’t gotten around to answering the question. i’m pretty much done with the second part, i just need to revise it a little. i think after i post part 2, i’ll try to interpret all the gojo and utahime moments in the manga >.<

#gojohime #gouta #gojo x utahime

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nobutfredweasleytho · 4 years ago

Text

YOU JUST DON’T LISTEN(F.W)

Summary: Fred’s ex girlfriend writes him a letter to explain the how him using her wrecked her emotionally.

Warnings: angst, like a lot of angst, depressed Y/N, mentions of self doubt, a little swearing, mentions of parents not loving correctly, used reader. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: Major thank you to Gabriella @onlyfreds for being an amazing person and encouraging me to write whatever this mess is. I am forever grateful to you

(The font is terrible Im sorry im just getting used to working on tumblr)

Fred Weasley checked the muggle clock on his nightstand. 10:30 AM. His mom will call him for breakfast anytime now. He has been awake for quite some time if he can even count the 30 minutes he tried to sleep but couldn’t, not when every time he tries to close his eyes his mind and eventually dreams are clouded by her. By the last time he looked at her, how devastated she looked, How her face was wet from her tears and her eyes bloodshot red, but the thing Fred will never be able to forget is her voice. How raw and vulnerable she sounded while saying the most horrible thing’s anyone has ever said to him, but he can’t blame her, he has no one to blame but himself because in the end it was he who caused all of this and now its come to bite him in the ass. He hears the door open and his twin brother George enters.

“Mom says breakfast is ready and she wants you downstairs. She says she’ll drag you herself if you don’t show up again today.”

“Tell her I’m not hungry and I’ll come grab a bite later.” I really don’t feel like being surrounded by other people right now. Not in this pathetic state I’m in. Besides it will take me willpower I don’t have to not hex Ron into oblivion.

“Well she will not take no for an answer and I wont either. What’s done is done now and you’ll have to face the world someday so start with your own family because everyone down there is worried sick about you and the least you can do is show your face once in a while so they know you haven’t died of starvation or sleep deprivation.” George has worry written all over him and I’m sure the rest of the family has it too. I feel even more like shit for worrying them.

“Fine. But I come back here if she is mentioned are we clear?”

“We weren’t gonna mention Y/N anyway now lets go moms worried sick for your dumbass.”

Breakfast was going smoothly with Ginny and Ron being exited for Quidditch season, Harry and Bill discussing the unfortunate events of the Triwizard tournament last year, dad asking Hermione about a rubber duck whatever that is, but the most shocking thing is mom asking me and George about the joke shop products. George is doing most of the talking but still the fact that shes even asking is awesome. I was finally feeling peaceful this whole winter break until I heard a hoot outside the window.

“I thought it was Tuesday but since mail is here does it mean its Friday already? Oh how fast time is going.

“No Arthur honey you are right it is Tuesday, Bill or George can one of you see if that owl has the owners name attached to it and bring whatever letter he has here to see who is it for.”

Bill got up from his seat and went to the window next to the countertop to look at the mystery owl. “Do we even know a Y/N Y/L/N?”

The room went quiet. The only thing that could be heard was the owls hoot asking for its treat. Bill seemed not to realise this as he took the letter from the owl, gave him a treat and sent it on its way.

“To Fred Weasley from Y/N Y/L/N… Who’s Y/N is she the girl you’ve been crying over this whole time huh Freddie?” Bill chuckled but I just grabbed the letter. I had no time to even be mad at him because once again my mind fogs up with only her. I couldn’t help but feel relieved and the happiest I felt in a long time. She has forgiven me. Y/N forgave me. That has to be it. Why else would she send me a letter?

“I had a great time with you guys but there’s important matters for me to attend so I have to go to now. Thanks mom the breakfast was amazing as always.” And with that I sprinted towards my room, locked the door and examined the letter in my hands. It was a bunch of them in here. I went to mine and George’s worktable threw some papers that were on top of it to make room for these letters and carefully opened the envelope.

The first thing that I grabbed was a photo. It was a polaroid of me and Y/N on the Gryffindor common room. Happiness filled my heart when I started remembering this night. I looked at the back of the polaroid and surely enough there was a writing on it.

Fred and Yn on the Gryffindor common room at 1 AM the night she turned 17. Listening to ABBA’s “Dancing Queen”. Picture taken by major 3rd wheel George Weasley.

Tears filled my eyes when I remember this night. It was the night I looked at her the way I always should have. Not as a replacement of someone who didn’t care about me.

The next one was also a polaroid photograph but this one I don’t remember being taken. It’s a picture of Y/N teaching me how to play the guitar. I can make up that we are in her dorm but not more as the picture is taken in black and white. I look at the back and surely this one also has a writing on it but the handwriting doesn’t look familiar at all.

A drunken Y/N accompanied by a even drunker Fred trying to play the guitar in the middle of the night. If I fail my charms exam tomorrow I’m killing you both but right now you two look adorable. Picture taken by Cho Chang.

The third one is an actual letter. I chuckle looking at the handwriting. Always so precise and not even one line out of place. I always thought Y/Ns handwriting always contradicts her hot headed persona but it’s actually really cute. I start reading the letter and my heart stops.

Dear Freddie,

I can only imagine the shock that receiving a letter from me would cause you right now especially after our last conversation.

But I have a lot to get off of my chest and I wont be able to move on if I haven’t said it all. Call me a coward but I was really scared to ask you to meet me so I can say it in person, but maybe that’s what I have always been. A coward. A coward because I get scared when someone wants to enter my life, a coward because I hate trying new things at the expense of failing, a coward because I should be able to confront people who brought darkness and sadness to my life.

But one thing I will admit Fred Weasley is that I wasn’t a coward when It came to loving you. It was the first time that I let someone come into my life and heart the way you did, and it will probably be the last. Throughout our “relationship” if you can even call it that as it was more of you customizing me to be her, to be someone I’m not. But that’s why you even talked to me is it, because I reminded you of her.

The signs were right in front of me and I feel stupid enough not to have seen them. But I guess people are right when they say love is blind. Love is such a funny thing to me as the first time I experienced the right kind of love was through you. But that was me creating stuff in my head. You didn’t love me no, you loved the idea of me. But I loved you. I loved you more than anything or anyone I have ever loved, I loved everything about you. But you just don’t listen. You don’t listen to anyone around you. Not George, not your other siblings, not Lee or any of your other friends for that matter, not your professors, but most importantly you don’t listen to me.

You didn’t listen when I told you that the love my parents gave me was only because I reminded them of my brother, the love my old friends back home gave me was one of interest. Everywhere I go no matter who I talk to no one will love me for me. I came to accept that until I met you.

You were funny and crazy and brave and oh so gorgeous. You were basically everything I looked for in… well everything. In a friend or in a partner it doesn’t matter. I thought you saw me for who I am. A broken teenager with issues but that at the end of the day was deserving of love. Oh how wrong I have been but no more wrong than you. You knew this but you just didn’t listen.

That makes us both horrible people now does it. Me who thought you were some kind of savior or some kind of saint and selfishly wrapped myself around your love and you who used me because I remind you of your ex girlfriend who broke your heart. But mine is excused I feel like and yours isn’t.

You would have kept me going for who knows how long just so you can live your imaginations you had for someone else.

Did you think about her the first time we slept together?

Was I not enough for you Freddie?

Was I too clingy too soon?

Is it my hot temper that gets the best of me?

So many questions will be left unanswered on my end because frankly, I never want to speak of you again. Sure I am deprived of love but I will not take it if its not directed directly at me.

I still care about you and will continue to support you and George on whatever you set your mind into. I was waking through Diagon Alley last week and saw this little store with a “for sale” sign. It’s right in the middle of Diagon Alley. I hate how my first thought went that you would have loved it but I seem to do that a lot recently.

I’ll get dressed and think would Fred love this skirt or this shirt.

I start applying lipstick and I’ll think will Fred love this color.

I start eating and I’ll think does this look good enough that Fred would’ve stolen a piece of it when I’m talking to Ginny.

I don’t even know why I am telling you this. How pathetic I’ve become clinging into someone that doesn’t want me.

Anyway I’ve probably bored you enough with my ranting but I wouldn’t have been able to move on unless I said everything that felt heavy on my heart. I also attached some photos I thought you’d like to keep seeing as now you can see yourself with Kayla without having the burden to be near me.

Say hi to your siblings and Harry for me.

Have a nice life,

Y/N

#harry potter #fred x y/n #fred weasley series #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley #fred weasley angst #george weasley #hogwarts #fred and goerge weasley #weasley family #sadnees #i hate this

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nonstoplover · 4 years ago

Text

protagonist ~ joe liebgott (band of brothers)

my masterlist | my hbo war masterlist

pairing: joe liebgott x female reader

short summary: joe's assigned to search for the perfect house for easy's hq in the new town they'll soon arrive to on their way through germany and finds one with a girl in there who's like the protagonist of one of the comics he's read - courageous, fearless, heroic.

words: 2.5K

a/n: first of all, sorry for disappearing, exam season has started at my uni and i've been hella busy these past weeks (and gonna be for the following few as well, u g h ).

anyway this fic came around from a conversation i had with the lovely @now-im-a-belieber when i was telling her about an idea i had and she technically came up with the base of this. thank you, Pearl, i love you xx (i hope i did justice to your idea)

oh and let's just say i have no clue if this would have been possible, at least the exact way i wrote it.

taglist: @how-are-those-nuts-sarge @50svibes @pennyllanne @nowinnablewar

gif credit: @basilone

Four loud bangs sound against her front door right as she starts washing the dishes after they finished lunch. With her eyes widening in surprise she rushes back into the room, telling the family of three to hide as she's drying her hands in her apron before making her way to the door.

After taking a deep breath she grabs the handle and opens it. The next thing she knows is being pushed to the side as a figure storms in past her without a word. A gasp leaves her lungs as her back lightly collides with the wall, head turning to watch as the soldier barges in the house.

What is going on? Has someone found out about them?

With a hand reaching behind her back she pushes herself off the wall and hurries behind the man. Trying hard to sound completely calm and innocent she asks him what is going on, but he only barks back something almost inaudible - only a few German words reach her ears.

The soldier is moving with such speed that she hasn't got a single chance to get a better look at his uniform as he's entering every room one by one. Who is he? Worry swiftly floods her veins - more importantly, what is he looking for?

She can only pray the family has had enough time to properly hide.

As he reaches that door, she holds her breath back, repeating her little prayer like a mantra inside her head. The man comes to a sudden halt just as he steps through the doorframe and in an instant fear makes her blood turn freezing cold. She carefully moves closer to glance inside next to his body, not knowing what to expect.

And what she sees makes everything else in her mind disappear - just the thoughts of all hell breaking loose any time now move around inside.

Her best friend crouches on the other side of the room, clearly frozen mid-movement as her body is still half out of the hiding spot, eyes wide as she stares at the soldier, not a single muscle moving. It's like everyone's got frozen in time, none of the three people makes a move.

Liebgott's mind slow to catch up to what he sees - he didn't expect to see that as he rushed through the house. He's only been trying to decide whether it's a good place for Easy's HQ, as he has been ordered to do when Winters sent him ahead of the company.

His eyes then start moving around the room, trying hard to find a good reason as to why that girl is half inside the wall. A book is laying on the table next to the door, open at around the middle. With one glance at the pages he recognises the letters of the hebrew alphabet, and suddenly it all makes sense.

She's a Jew.

His breath hitches in his throat as he struggles to comprehend this new information, and just in that very moment the silence is broken by a voice. And it's not coming from either of the two girls in the room - more like it's coming from inside the wall.

One simple sentence, ending with a Yiddish term of endearment - one he can perfectly understand. It came from a woman, asking the girl crouching facing him from across the room why she's stopped moving.

There are more Jews in there.

His lungs fill with a sharp breath he's taken and he spins around, staring straight at the girl who opened the front door only minutes prior. The question must be clear in his eyes as she starts stammering in defense, her voice audibly shaking.

Joe shakes his head, stopping her mid-sentence. "No, they're Jews, I can see it," he says in perfect German, and the already pale girl suddenly seems even whiter.

He swiftly grabs her arm and pulls her in the direction he remembers finding the dining room in, trying to find a chair for her to sit down on, as she's visibly close to fainting - though the reason behind it he can't find.

(y/n) flinches with utter fear, weakly trying to resist being pulled away - he most probably is now taking her away to kill her, right? He's a German soldier, that's what his job is. But no matter how hard she tries to wiggle away, his grip is too tight around her arm and she can't do a thing.

Just when they arrive to the dining room and he kind of pushes her into one of the chairs is when Joe realises that she's scared of him - she immediately pushes the chair further away from him as soon as he lets go of her. So that's why she's shaking so bad.

"No, wait, don't be scared," he rushes to say. "I'm a Jew too."

This finally breaks the scaredness - instead her eyes fill with utter confusion. Her forehead wrinkles as she tries to make sense of what he's saying. How can a German soldier be Jewish? It makes absolutely no sense.

With a sudden wave of suspicion she moves her glance down to his uniform, examining every detail she can lay her eyes upon.

Is he not German?!

Suddenly she can see differences - details about his uniform that she's never seen on a German soldier before, and she's seen her fair share of those in the past years.

But if he's not German, who is he and what is going on?

She takes a still shaky breath and looks back up into his eyes - seeing the waiting expression on his face as he's standing there in patient silence for her to say something.

"Are you-" Her voice cracks mid-sentence. It's not good. She clears her throat and tries again. "Are you German?"

All of a sudden he bursts out laughing - so loud, and somehow so dark that her eyes widen once again. She just can't decide if it's from fear again, or only surprise.

A minute or so goes by with nothing but Joe laughing - this must be one of the most hilarious things he's heard in the past couple years. That he is a German.

Then his laughter finally quietens down to slight chuckling and he speaks up once more to confirm the truth. "No, of course not," he shakes his head in amusement. One look in her eyes tells him that somehow she still has no clue about his nationality, so he opens his lips again to give an answer to her question in advance. "I'm American. Don't worry, you're not in trouble for that," Joe points back in the direction of the room with the hiding spot above his shoulder.

A loud sigh escapes her lungs, her shoulder visibly falling a bit as she slumps more into the chair. It feels like years worth of stress and nervousness have just come to an end - it's truly like an enormous stone has rolled down from her chest and shoulders. She somehow feels free again for the first time in years.

Relief completely replaces the worry and fear in her veins as all other thoughts leave her mind. She's not gonna die. At least not today.

"They're Jewish," the soldier speaks again - and it's not a question. More like a statement.

(y/n) nods, unable to say a word as she's still overwhelmed with her new feelings.

"You're hiding them?"

She just raises an eyebrow, and Joe mentally slaps himself - what a stupid question. He could've might as well just asked her the colour of the wall.

"Since when you've been hiding them?" He corrects his question.

"Ever since the whole thing has started," she answers, her voice so quiet it almost disappears in the air between them.

"Wow," Liebgott breathes out before he can stop himself. He stares at the girl in disbelief. She looks so innocent and young - she's probably one or two years younger than him. How could she pull off something such a thing? Such a dangerous and pretty reckless thing?

"Esther is my best friend, she's been ever since we were little kids, they all are like a second family to me, I've spent most of my days with them," (y/n) explains, the relief causing her to ramble and Joe - for about the first time in his life has to struggle to keep up with the German words that come flying out past her lips. "I just had to help them, you know. I couldn't just leave them here."

"Where's your own family?"

"My parents left to France to be further away from the chaos, and my brother joined the Luftwaffe, and since then I haven't heard from none of them."

"Why didn't you leave with your parents as well?" The young soldier keeps asking, moving closer to the table and sitting down on a chair on the opposite side, facing her. Pushing his M1's strap down his shoulder he places the weapon on the table, pushing it only a little further in order to calm the girl more. He knows he probably shouldn't do this - and keep Winters waiting, but he's too curious to stop himself, he has to hear the rest of her story.

"I love this town, I was born and raised here," she shrugs as if it's obvious. "But more importantly, I didn't want to leave and let innocent people like my best friend's family suffer. I wanted to stay and fight back as good as I could."

Joe subconsciously mumbles under his breath before he can stop himself - words that praise her absolute bravery, words that give away his true feelings he suddenly feels towards her - then he has to move his gaze away from her, fearing that she sees the embarrassment in his eyes. He tries hard to think of another question while also trying hard to forget the look of the half-smiling expression that took over her face just a moment before - it does nothing good for his heart.

"Did you make that hidden room yourself?" He asks in the end, thinking back to what he saw in the room.

"Oh," she giggles - and it's the prettiest sound he's heard in a very long time. "No, my father made it when me and my brother were young and often played hide and seek. I just improved it a little so they can fit in more comfortably."

Liebgott hums, not knowing how to tell her - or if he should even tell her in the first place - how absolutely super impressed she left him with every single thing she's told him and what he's seen. It's one of the craziest things he has ever heard, and he had a fair share of unbelievable stories told to him in his life. He simply couldn't even imagine how on Earth this girl could manage to do this - and not get caught. Throughout the whole war.

In that very moment he swiftly decides that he'll go and find another house for the HQ, and that he'll somehow get back to this particular one, no matter what it takes. He wants to get to know her better. He has to get to know her better.

She's the most incredible woman he's ever heard of, read about or met. She's a woman who fits in the stories of the comics he's been reading his whole life - as the protagonist, the hero. He can't leave this town without hearing more about her, seeing her face more. That would be the biggest regret of his whole life, he can already tell.

But for now, he has to leave. It wouldn't be a good idea to keep his officers waiting even longer.

He stands up, fingers reaching out to grab his M1 before looking back into her eyes. Damn, he doesn't even know her name.

"I have to head back to my company, but I'll come back later, if that's okay with you."

Her eyes are already on his, seemingly staring straight into his soul with that intensity that lays in her (y/e/c) orbs. The girl then rises to her feet - still never breaking the eye contact.

Thoughts race inside her head, and it's like an angel and a demon are sitting on each of her shoulders, one telling her to say no whilst the other trying to convince her to say yes.

What if he only wants to use her? What if he only wants to sleep with her? Maybe force her to do so, threatening her with his knowledge of the Jewish family. He might not even be who and what he says he is. How could she know?

But on the other hand, there is this feeling she has about him. A feeling that tells her that nothing she previously thought will happen. She doesn't know what it is, but it's there, right in her chest, and she can't fight it. He seems genuinely curious and impressed, and honest. And she feels a pull towards him. She wants to see him again.

In the end, the devil on her shoulder wins, and she simply nods - right before she could change her mind.

"I'm Joe," the young soldier moves around the table, one hand held out towards her.

A glance cast down and right back up to his face she takes his hand and gives it a shake, holding onto it tightly, as if only to let him know how strong she actually is.

It probably works, 'cause he raises an eyebrow, slightly tilts his head and the corners of his lips curve up into the smallest smirk she's ever seen - but it's there.

"(y/n)," she eventually answers with her own introduction.

A few seconds pass and neither has let go of the other's hand, not yet. They just stand there, staring into each other's eyes, only the small noises of them breathin breaking the silence.

Then Liebgott blinks, clears his throat, pulls his hand out from her grip and instinctively places his fingers upon his weapon hanging from his shoulder whilst nodding towards her as a gesture of saying goodbye without words.

She watches as he turns around and walks out from the room, and after a tiny, happy sigh she follows the sound of his steps.

Just as he opens the front door and moves through it is when she arrives to the hall. Joe glances back over his shoulder for one last time, offering her a small smile, then looks back ahead of him and continues his walk as if nothing has happened. None of the past dozen of minutes.

(y/n) leans against the doorframe and watches him right until he disappears in the distance with a dreamy look in her eyes.

She can't wait until he comes back again.

.::the end::.

(might write a part two if i'll have time and you'd like to read it)

my masterlist | my hbo war masterlist

[wanna be added to my taglist?]

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sillyguyhotline · 4 years ago

Note

17. “How is any of this ok?” with Joe and Sara maybe?

dude im gonna be completely honest i havent written anything in like a month so i think the quality isnt gonna be great but here goes nothing

God, Sara missed the feeling of home.

Every semblance of familiarity and comfort she’d once found in the town she’d grown up in, the house she’d spent her childhood running through, now felt chillingly foreign.

Perhaps it was the heavy burden of knowledge weighing fresh upon her shoulders: ASUNARO’s corruption seemed now to peer slyly around every corner, no matter where she went. She still didn’t know how much of the town had rotted away under its grasp, how much of the town its poison had pervaded… but she was probably better off not knowing.

Whatever was left of Midori, that miserable mix of pulsing blood and electronic emotion, had been ground to bits inside that coffin… but Sara couldn’t ignore the creeping fear that his burning, ever-present gaze would appear out of nowhere and terrorize her again.

But he wouldn’t. The death game was over, and they’d promised they would never hurt her or any of her loved ones again.

Most of the loved ones she still encountered day-to-day, gruesomely blood splattered and sitting like corpses propped up hastily in a corner, would be safe no matter if ASUNARO was fresh on her tail or a thousand miles away. What a cruel price to pay for safety, to never be hurt again.

They still lived on if Sara closed her eyes tight enough, if she listened to the twisting words of the hallucinations and let them convince her she was monstrous. But the second she dared to open her eyes, she knew they’d be dead again. Life worked in terrible ways, and that was all there was to it.

Joe’s house had always been a second home to her, ever since the two of them became friends. Joe was the farthest cry from Sara in terms of social interactions- it had taken at least 3 months for Sara to trust Joe enough to invite him over, but Joe had insisted she hang out at his house the very same day they became friendly enough to exchange more than a sentence with each other.

There was a certain sort of comfort to the warmth of his house, the constant scent of cooking food pervading the air and the little trinkets scattered in every corner. No surface of his house went without decoration, in its silly little way. It was full of pictures, too, some carefully framed and some dangling from the wall by pushpins, but Sara got the sense that none of the photos went unloved. Most of them were occupied by an orange-haired man, often carrying a younger Joe (back when he was still sporting that atrocious crew cut). Sara always assumed it was his dad, but thought it would be impolite to ask… particularly when the weeks stretched on and Sara had yet to meet that mysterious orange-haired man.

Eventually, pictures of Sara began to join the collage on the wall- pictures taken as she butchered yet another pop song during karaoke, or when they went out to get food, or when she mistakenly sat down on a traffic cone during gym (after many protests from Sara, he took that one down). As silly as the pictures were, and as obvious as it was that Joe had waited for the most embarrassing moments to take them, it was sort of sweet in a way.

Joe’s mother was always kind to her, though there was a constant weariness in her eyes that Sara always felt a bit uneasy about questioning. Sometimes she’d let the two of them cook things in the kitchen, but more often than not they’d go up to Joe’s room and screw around in there, with video games or music or the 50 times Joe tried to persuade Sara to climb out the window and sit on the roof with him before she finally agreed.

As rare as it was for Sara to agree to sit on the roof, it was even rarer for Joe to agree to study with her, much to Sara’s chagrin. Joe had always walked a fine line between passing and failing, but Sara had to admit he walked it well. When she did manage to convince him to study, though (usually the day before final exams), they’d sit on the cushy couch in his living room and somehow manage to bother each other as much as possible while feigning concentration.

The couch hadn’t changed after several years- Sara could tell that much the minute she sat down on it and avoided the urge to break eye contact with Joe’s mother. It was still well-worn, a couch that likely should have been replaced at least a decade ago but had never really been disposed of. Loose threads were protruding from the cover, drawn out from years of visitors fidgeting with them.

Sara shifted uncomfortably in her seat, the slight motion making her sink deeper into the couch’s soft cushioning. She’d only spent one minute in the house and was already sweating, whether from the heat of the home or the thousand-yard stare of the woman sitting across from her.

Ryoko was there, too, sitting to Sara’s left and gazing listlessly at the well-trodden carpet beneath her feet. …Ryoko.

Sara cast a hesitant glance around the room, duly noting the photos covering the walls. Not a single one of hers had been taken down, but several more photos had appeared with Joe’s beaming face featuring prominently in them. Joe’s presence was always enough to fill a room even when he wasn’t speaking; it took a lot to fill in the gaps left by his absence.

God, she missed him.

The wind whistled against the window-screen; Sara had memorized the familiar creak of the wooden window frame being lifted up to welcome in the mild autumn air. Sara had always thought of autumn as a beginning- she loved summer as much as any other kid, but as the haze of the weather began to wind down she was quick to grow impatient and look forward to the school year, to being productive again. Joe had always disagreed with her.

“Fall is the literal death of fun,” he’d complained once, walking home with Sara after finishing the first week of school. “Couldn’t they have pushed back the first day of school by, like, another week? You think if we got enough people to sign a petition, they’d give us an extra week of summer?”

“Oh, come on, we both know even if you had an extra week of summer you’d just be complaining a week later,” Sara had teased back.

The death of fun. It certainly felt like that, Sara decided. She’d never feared the looming darkness of fall and winter quite so much before. But now, she supposed, there was no sunshine who’d weather it with her.

“Well… Sara?” Joe’s mother spoke up, voice hoarse with the sound of repressed tears in her throat. Sara recognized the sound all too well.

There was no resentment in the woman’s eyes when Sara made eye contact with her. No anger, no frustration, nor had there been any in her measured motions when she welcomed Sara into the home. It didn’t take any words for Sara to tell that there was no blame to be foisted upon her.

She was still Joe’s best friend.

“I’m sorry to have dragged you out here on such short notice.” The woman’s voice was weak. “I don’t know all the details of what happened, of course. Haven’t heard anything, aside from the little tidbits the police told me when I dropped by the station.”

Sara’s shoulders stiffened at the mention of the police, at the idea of them pleasantly answering her questions as though they weren’t just as complicit in that tragedy as ASUNARO had been.

“And…” the woman glanced down at her hands, toughened from a lifetime of working. “I know something terrible happened to you. The circles under your eyes are darker than midnight, I know it’s so selfish of me to be dragging you out here, but… I haven’t slept a wink for weeks. Been so worried about Joe, and about you too.”

She nodded in the direction of the black-haired girl who hadn’t spoken a word the entire time. “Ryoko’s been worried about the both of you, too. Your parents weren’t answering the door, so she went to me. I hope you’ll forgive the two of us for disturbing you, Sara, but… you have the answers the police won’t give us, don’t you?”

God, her gaze was piercing.

“...Yeah. Yeah, I do.”

It was taking everything in Sara’s power not to look at the vacant seat to her right. If Joe was there, he would have been laughing and lightening the mood, completing the circle that had been left so jarringly empty.

But they wouldn’t have been having this conversation if Joe was there.

Ms. Tazuna nodded slowly. “This means the world to me, Sara. Don’t forget that.”

Sara did her best to muster a smile. “Don’t worry. I won’t.”

The woman gave another nod, eyes defocusing as though even now, she wasn’t quite sure why she was there. “Alright. Alright. Well, then…” She cleared her throat uncomfortably. “Guess I should get right to the point, yeah? Is he… is… how is he…?”

So she still hadn’t quite let go of that little thread of hope, even after seeing Sara return home safe and alive with no best friend in tow. Who was Sara to judge? When hope was the only thing to cling to, it only made sense to cling to it like a lifeline.

Sara twisted her hands, the same old nervous habit she’d had for years, and wondered briefly if she’d picked it up from Ms. Tazuna. How terrible it was, to carry the news that nobody, much less any mother, ever wanted to hear.

“I… I’m sorry, Ms. Tazuna. He didn’t make it out alive.”

Sara hadn’t expected the hush that immediately fell over the room. She’d expected immediate tears, the grieving cry of a mother in pain. Instead, the room became muffled, still as a painting captured in time.

Slowly, Ryoko looked up from her bitten-down fingers, eyes rimmed red already. Ryoko had always been an emotional person, the only person Sara knew who could fluctuate from full-on sobs to cheerful giggles in less than a minute. Sara was so unused to the look that was now filling her eyes- cold, solid misery. As though there were no tears in her eyes left to cry, no more tragedies to bemoan. Just a deep and horrified comprehension of just how many things in her life had gone wrong.

And, slowly, Ms. Tazuna began to cry.

Tears had become so uncomfortable for Sara to bear witness to. Was it selfish of her to look away? It couldn’t be, not when every raw sob reminded her of the art student seeing her first (and certainly not last) death, of the broken sibling openly weeping over apologies gone unspoken, of the unknowing siblings screaming their throats out with pleas for death so the other could survive.

Especially not now. Not when every tear rang in her mind as a reminder of cold tubes piercing her best friend’s chest, of his corpse slumping and falling in a pool of blood, because oh god he wasn’t supposed to have lost so much blood, how was he supposed to live without it, of the clickclickclickclickclicking rising in volume while her attempts to save him grew feebler and feebler.

Her hands were bloodstained, no matter how many times she tried to scrub them clean. Those dreadful hands of hers had failed her, failed Joe, failed the women sobbing openly in front of her.

She swallowed back the apologies that always rose in her throat as Ms. Tazuna rushed to sniffle back her tears.

“I… god, I… he’s really gone?”

Sara couldn’t bear to look her in the eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

“Please… please tell me it was a peaceful death. He didn’t… suffer too much, did he?”

The resounding wave of clicks flooded her mind. “It was as peaceful as I could make it. I… he smiled at me, right before he died. I’d… very much like to think that means he was happy when he died.”

“What happened?” Ryoko’s voice came out rough, the first of it Sara had heard in weeks. “Joe told me, after our date, that he was going to walk you home, and then neither of you showed up at school the next day. And now… it’s been three weeks? And Joe… Joe’s dead? What the hell happened, Sara?”

“God,” Sara mumbled, mesmerizing herself with the twisting motions of her own hands. “I’m not sure if you’d even believe me if I told you. I don’t even know if I believe what happened myself.”

“I’d believe anything.” The sentence was firm. “I just want to know what happened.”

Sara nodded wearily. The familiar weight of her bright orange ponytail was notably missing- the day after she’d escaped, she’d demanded the hairdresser cut her hair short and crisp. She shuddered every time she thought about the ponytail brushing against her neck as she spent each argument screaming and protesting for her life. Even worse was the memory of how carefully Joe had styled her hair, forsaking his usual clumsiness to braid every strand with a remarkable tenderness. She didn’t want to remember any of it- even though, as the locks went cascading to the floor, she was reminded starkly of Keiji’s bleach-stained trauma response.

“For some reason, something to do with the mafia, we were kidnapped. And pulled into a death game. There were twenty of us, including me and Joe. I- I’m not going to get into all the specifics. It’s going to make me sick to my stomach if I do. But… they made us play this sadistic fucking game to narrow down the competition. Based on cards. Joe drew a bad card, and… they executed him.” Something in Sara’s throat tightened as she finished speaking, and she fell silent.

“Just like that?” His mother’s voice came out as a hoarse whisper. “How… how’d they kill him?”

“I’d rather not say.” There came the gushing sound of blood pulsing through the tubes. “He didn’t suffer too long” - she hoped - “but it was a gruesome way to die. I don’t want to think about it, please understand.”

It took a moment for his mother to register the words and nod, face still painted with horror.

“Why… how did the two of you even end up there in the first place?” Ryoko spoke up again. “You said something about the mafia? How the hell are you two connected with the mafia?”

“I don’t know how I am,” Sara responded immediately. “It must be something with my family. I couldn’t control any of this, I swear, but… Joe wasn’t meant to end up there at all.”

Ryoko paused. “He… he wasn’t meant to end up there?”

Sara swallowed back the lump in her throat. “The game… it was something that was being prepared for ages. There weren’t just a few ragtag kidnappers behind it, there was an entire organization. Even the police were involved. They ran AI tests, hundreds if not thousands of them, trying to calculate who’d be the most likely to win. And… when all the numbers came back, the person most likely to win… was me.”

She spread her arms wide, baring her sins and her cruelties to the world, and in that moment felt distinctly like the angel of death Keiji had branded her to be.

“They needed something to drag me down, I guess. Make the odds more balanced. So they dragged Joe into this fucking mess. I guess they thought that him being there would keep me steady enough to make everything fair.” A cold hand, dripping with tendrils of phantom blood, caressed her chin with a lethal grip. “...They were right.”

Ryoko’s gaze had gone cold again. “So Joe died just because you cared about him? What the fuck kind of death sentence is that?”

Sara shook her head numbly.

“Why did it have to be him?” The heartbreak in Ryoko’s voice was clearer than day. “So many people love you, Sara, why did it have to be him? Hell, I’m your best friend too, aren’t I? Why couldn’t it have been me? I’m a much worse person than Joe ever was, I deserved to be in his place way more. Couldn’t they have killed me instead?”

Sara winced at the growing desperation in her best friend’s voice, the raw crack she knew all too well. It should have been me, it should have been me, it should have been me. Sara could have almost fooled herself into seeing a crisp aquamarine when Ryoko’s hair flashed into the light.

“Ryoko… it could have been.”

The girl fell silent.

“They had files on you too. They knew how close we were, they knew how much you meant to me… but Joe was in the wrong place at the wrong time. And they fucking killed him for it.”

Oh, how she wished she could go back to that balmy early-autumn night, see the smile on Joe’s face and listen to his lighthearted laughter again. The desire to keep one’s friend safe had become a crime deserving of a death sentence.

Ryoko’s eyes remained locked to Sara’s, devoid of any dullness. In the look they exchanged was a deep, sinking understanding, one that had nauseated Sara to the core the first time the realization struck her.

It was by no crafty strategy that Joe had died instead of Ryoko, no favoritism biased against the kindest person either of them would ever know. It was a simple, terrible twist of fate. Ryoko could have taken his place had she done something as inconsequential as offering to walk Sara home instead.

But she hadn’t.

It took everything in Sara’s power to avoid wondering what would’ve changed if she had.

“How is any of this okay?” Ryoko broke the silence weakly. “They killed him- they could have killed me, too. He was seventeen. Seventeen. How did anybody let this happen? How did this happen, Sara?”

“I- I don’t know.” Ryoko’s wrath was simmering; even though Sara knew truly that she wasn’t the subject of the anger, she still felt scalded. “I miss him so much, Ryoko. I watched him die, and nothing in my power let me save him. I miss him, Ryoko, I miss him every waking minute of every day. We were supposed to escape together and get out safe and pretend this never happened, but…” the tears were beginning to well up again. She couldn’t bear the thought of breaking down in front of anyone, especially not over him.

“I’m going to go make some coffee,” his mother interrupted suddenly. She’d been noticeably quiet, but the still-fresh streaks of tears painted down her cheeks told the story she didn’t need to vocalize. “Some coffee, and some snacks. And we’ll keep talking from there, alright? Do you guys have your phones?”

The two girls nodded uneasily.

“Please… find any pictures you have of him. I want to make this wall as bright as possible.”

Without any other words, she hurried out of the room, and it fell to silence once more. Outside the window, the cool autumn breeze began to stir the leaves in the air, gusting forward to brush against Sara’s cheek just as the hallucination had done mere minutes ago.

And the Tazuna household began to feel more like home again.

#is this worth publishing to ao3 #idk #gonna put it in the tags im feelin risky tonight #yttd #joe tazuna #sara chidouin #ryoko hirose #joesara #i guess #i just tag anything joesara at this point even if it's not outright romantic #idc whether it's romantic or platonic honestly #theyre them #and thats all that matters

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bubmyg · 3 years ago

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there was no particular reason i wrote all this down other than reading the translations to my universe made me cry last week because i’m just Like this. this is a mini compilation of yoongi lyrics that i hold gently in my palm and close to my heart in a he’s my artist for life kind of way. these aren’t all my favorite yoongi lyrics, i certainly have more but not ones that fit this general vibe.

this is like extremely disorganized, i kind of just wrote it like a journal (and i’ll probably copy it to my bullet journal at some point actually). interpretations are my own, music is cool in that we can all read and hear the same thing and get different things out of it (which is why yoongi has often said he doesn’t attach specific meaning to things, giving it up to the listener instead)

so yeah. here’s me being fond of yoongi in 4k for no reason other than. idk. i wanted to. all translations are from doyoubangtan and doolsetbangtan.

song request - lee sora ft suga

“I’ll be with you, for your birth and your end; That you’d remember that I’m with you, wherever you are; I’ll be a comfort for your life at any time, and so; please, that you’d lean on me and take a rest, every once in awhile.”

to me, this perfectly encapsulates what creating music is for yoongi in a two-fold kind of way. not only does he want his music to be a source of comfort for those who listen to it (just as the art of music is for himself), he’s also consistent in his assurance that taking a rest is okay. not being okay is okay. simply existing for the time being is okay. it’s a gentle empathy that comes from the experienced heart of someone who’s not going to tell you that it is okay, but will tell you that it won’t always be like this. friendly little moon trying to get you to smile with him on sleepless nights.

so far away - agust d ft suran

dream, will eventually be in full bloom at the end of hardships

this was on my undergrad graduation cap. it’s one of my favorite lyrics of all time. if so far away is my heart song, this is my heart lyric. this is a common motif in yoongi’s lyrics; dormancy is only temporary, you will bloom at the end of the cold winter.

dream, hope it to be there with you at your creation and at the end of your life

creation to end is another common motif n his lyrics. in this specific context, i imagine it to most closely be analogous to holding dreams close to you your entire life. dreams are dreams no matter how they manifest, even if they’re simply something you long for until your “end”.

Hope it to be there with you at your creation and at the end of your life; It will be generous to you wherever you stand; It will eventually be in full bloom at the end of hardships; The beginnings will seem humble, so prosperous will the future be

the entirety of this song reads like a story and this last refrain reads like the conclusion (kind of). the slight wording change from the previous choruses means a lot in that regard, more definite and firm. you will be okay. maybe not now, maybe not next week. but you will be.

suga’s interlude - halsey ft suga

Though the dawn before sunrise is darkest; don’t forget the stars you longed for only rise in the darkness

just a really pretty but heart wrenching lyric in the context of the entire song. he’s also used this metaphor several times. i love me a good string of consistency with minor adaptations to fit the vibe. this song also made me cry the first time i read the translations lmao.

my universe - coldplay ft bts

Because the trial we face now is just for a moment anyway; All you have to do is to just keep shining bright like now; And we will follow you, embroidering this long night

this could mean so many things depending on how you wanted to contextualize it. of course the song is about love, so you could view it in that way. we’re in the midst of a global pandemic where we can’t see each other. or maybe it’s simply existence. continue to exist and one day your bright light will be followed even in the darkest of nights.

also the og title of telepathy being 잠시 (for a moment) is so...min yoongi you are so cool

people - agust d

Did someone say humans are the animals of wisdom?; The way I see it, humans are the animals of regret

Your ordinaries are my extraordinaries; Your extraordinaries are my ordinaries; Your ordinaries are my extraordinaries; Your extraordinaries are my ordinaries

super simple to understand which i think makes it more poignant. especially if you contextualize it with everything he’s said or written regarding the plight of fame and how he himself grapples with it as min yoongi.

28 - agust d ft niihwa

just this whole song. if song request encapsulates yoongi’s musical ethos, this captures a lot of his general musings.

paradise - bts

Just living like this, surviving like this, that’s my small dream; Dreaming dreams, grasping dreams, breathing breaths, it’s often too much

a more blunt take on the simply existing is a good enough dream. yoongi’s 2018 new years message was one of the things that made me go “yes. Him™” so paradise is very <3 for me

interlude: shadow - bts

Flying high scares me; I mean, nobody had told me; how lonely it is here –;how my leap could be my fall

another thing he uses frequently, even as recently as an interview regarding permission to dance. the contemplation of how a fall is far scarier than landing because getting back up is uncertain.

Yeah, I’m you and you’re me, do you finally get that now?; Yeah, you’re me and I’m you, do you finally get that now?

the entirety of this song is haunting particularly paired with the sampling and the music video as a visual but this part is just...the whole idea of competing internal voices throughout the narrative of the song or if you’d rather truly treat the lyrics like a piece of literature, you have quite the unreliable narrator, one that’s trying to grapple with his own sense of self.

140503 at dawn - agust d

Pretending that I’m not lonely, pretending that I’m not suffering; needlessly pretending that I’m okay, and pretending hard that I’m strong; I built a wall in front of me, “Don’t come inside”; I’m an island in this wide ocean, “Don’t abandon me”

the entirety of agust d just makes me ache but i mainly pulled this part because he uses the island metaphor consistently. here, it’s used like i said before; achingly.

this song also gets overlooked a lot in the larger context of agust d but anyway

eight - IU ft suga

Island, yeah this is an island; a small island that we made for each other; Yeah, mm, forever young, the word ‘forever’ is a sandcastle; A farewell is just like an emergency text warning of a disaster; A morning met together with yearning; As each of us pass this eternity, we’re sure to meet again on this island

can i be honest and say i forgot this song came out at the beginning of the pandemic. anyway, if you haven’t heard the various times that jieun has spoke about this song and it’s conveyance, i encourage you to. the music video also gives a beautiful visual.

i wrote a small analysis of this when it came out so i’ll just put it here

burn it - agust d ft max

I hope you don’t forget that giving up decisively also counts as courage

of course this can absolutely be taken at a literal meaning especially considering he said a similar iteration of this to someone on kkul fm BUT i also like looking at it in context of the entire song because maybe this is him trying to convince himself too, especially considering the wording of the last chorus doesn’t change it so it implies in order to get past the fire u need to let it burn first? burn it = giving up on some aspect of pain?

i see why max didn’t shut up for eight months about making this song i wouldn’t either hello

outro: tear - bts

im including this one firstly because i love the song but secondly to say i knew the second u all were surprised by yoongi saying he wrote this as essentially a break up song for bts and they all cried while listening to it that y’all don’t actually read or interact w their lyrics fjdklafjsd

just bc it’s a rap song doesn’t mean it’s a diss or a flex. weirdos.

intro: never mind - bts

I hope you forget about all your mistakes and such; Never mind; It’s not easy, but engrave this in your heart; If you think you’re going to crash, accelerate more, you idiot; Never mind, never mind; Whatever thorny path it may be, go run; Never mind, never mind; There are a lot of things that you can’t control

the entire composition of nevermind is similar to first love and shadow to me where you can just hear the emotion in his voice while performing it

this is also another general idea that he mentions a few different times through different songs which as we’ve seen i am <3 for

intro: the most beautiful moment in life - bts

once again i don’t have a specific lyric to pull i just love this song so much and i feel like it isn’t talked about enough because first of all the use of the basketball throughout the instrumental, the incorporation of the origin of his stage name into an entire song regarding his general existence as a performer and coming into the beginnings of sizeable fame, and just his general way of essentially writing one giant ode to something he loves and analogizing it to something else he loves to talk through internal struggles.

aka im once again saying min yoongi you’re so cool

first love - bts

same line of awe from above this whole song is just a story, a poem, a journal entry, a beautiful confession, i don’t know. this is yoongi’s best bts solo u can argue with a wall about it also if you were able to see this live i hope u have a terrible week (im joking)

every fancam i’ve ever seen of this makes me cry. so. do with that what you will in regards to how i feel about this song.

#i have no reason for posting this so im not gonna tag it with anything other than so i can find it again for myself JFEKWFJS #ffr #my writing #i just realized only one of these is from an ot7 song help #there are so many others. tomorrow. autumn leaves. mikrokosmos. black swan........

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poppyseedgirly · 2 years ago

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dancing on the beach at night

twirling, moon shine, sandy cheese & crackers

something mysterious and alluring about the beach at night

grab my hand, run with me,

reminds me of our days walking and walking

lake michigans heart beat calls to me, but like a blanket

the buzz in my chest laying on its sand

we walk the river, finding new woods, new places

something spooks the geese and they all fly away

the deer hops through the cat tails

beautiful cows at the county fair,

demolition derby, cars crunching, another buzz in my chest,

the smell of burnt rubber and steel,

I think how strange humans are, but it makes sense,

I enjoy things, but I feel like an observer,

im trying to be a part of something again,

my dreams have been more and more vivid recently

the beach sand lingers after awhile, in my shoes

remember to laugh and cry and live

I often get stuck in my head, my habits, burrowing

im going to work on getting better at expressing

im eating a lot of fruit cups recently, I dont know if they are good for me

should I try yoga? should I try to make friends, yes probably, its healthy

my burrow is safe, but its no way to live

I got a new job recently and I really like it

its at a children's book themed botanical garden

I feel good being outside

I like my new home, now is the time to work on other things though

I want to rewire my thinking, the last few years have been a lot

moved a lot, almost lost my two loves, lived in a place that made me sad during the pandemic, felt like that saying about a frog in a pot of boiling water

only now can I look back and realize how not ok I was in chicago

I feel lighter here, but I do get scared maybe it doesn't matter the place but its just me

but at least I can try to start fresh here, theres places I like to go here

im ready for fall, winter here might be hard

I want to read more, I need to set some goals for myself again

ill never forget that beach night,

lots of memories on that beach for us now

im sorry I get stuck In my worries

thank you for always reminding me how to live

#diary

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blushing-starker · 3 years ago

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Of sleeping angels and forgetful lovers

im back y'all, enjoy

Tony slips between the billowing curtains, careful to make his arrival as silent as possible: there is an angel slumbering just a few feet away and God help whoever awakens them with anything less than a kiss and sweet murmurs.

Not wanting to be struck down by another celestial deity twice in a millennia, he carefully maneuvers around the scattered objects on the marble floor; a low table straining under the weight of scrolls, thick manuscripts and what honestly seems to be a stone tablet; a few chests clumsily tipped over, gold, silk and fragrance oil bottles spilling from them luxuriously. Surprisingly enough, Tony has to avoid staining four lace dresses thrown on the floor.

Poor thing. Any admirer of the creature basking inside this chamber should have known better. It's an insult to even suggest a holy being should disgrace themselves by wearing anything lesser than silk or pure gossamer. Ignorant gnat is probably swimming in the underground by now.

Still. It would be rude to tarnish a gift that isn't his to rip apart and incinerate. His lover would take pleasure in doing that himself. So he moves his body to the side, inhaling sharply when the wind shifts a garment closer to his dusty lower half. Oh, he'd get back at the wind god after this.

To honestly believe he's ancient and unable to persevere under the childish attack, how ridiculous. The offending yard and a half of pink lace (angels tended to take up more space than human minds could comprehend, but the ones who liked to roam the Earth often diminished their size; his paramour would never dress in something that large with an altered body. He's self conscious of his low stature as it is.) flies overhead and he muffles a snicker. Asshole wind god can't calculate how much strength to use.

Finally, he's at the bed. Home at last. And then the wind blasts through the chamber and he picks up the smell. Dried blood, decomposing flesh, something musky and tangible in the air. After that comes the sound. A deep rasp, powerful and similarly fear inducing as a lightning storm amidst the sea. It's a warning growl Tony had ignored, once, an uncountable number of years before. He counts them now, hastily and quickly, because surely his nemesis has grown tired and. Well. Not slow, but certainly slower in that long expanse of time. Just as he had. Fuck.

The beast appears, a vengeful mass of writhing smoke and viridescent ash hovering near the side of the bed he's currently trapped against. His lover disliked it when he brought war to the chamber, said it reminded him of harsher times and a dying Tony; he had left his knives and whip with his second in command, had gone so far for his beloved as to purge the poison from his body. (Listen. Listen. A shit ton of years past, a moron tried to eat him. Actually hoisted him on a spit before he woke up and strangled the fucker. So what if he has poison coursing through his veins to defend himself, it's not that nonsensical.)

From the grey and green smoke, a dark head emerges. And another. And another. And four fucking others and why hadn't his lover mentioned anything, why hadn't he warned Tony of the very amused looking, incredibly spiteful monster currently hissing at him? He has no arms here, the chamber's strongest weapon was currently dozing on a six feet wide bed, soft snores muffled against fluffy pillows. Oh, if his father could see him now, facing death at the hands of his enemy rather than bring his partner back from the golden fields of dreams.

Technically, he's facing the many headed beast in favor of facing his darling, a much more wrathful creature, but his father need not know that.

Death looms closer, is rearing its ugly heads and flaunting the seven inch fangs that will most likely shred him to pieces. There are ruby droplets splattered on the neck of the monster and ah, there's the ignorant admirer. At least he won't be devoured hungrily. Granted, he will definitely be devoured slowly and tortuously no matter what.

As his vision is swarmed by the huge monstrosity, Tony thinks of his beloved. Of his soft, brown hair. A little long, a little curly and always brushed aside uselessly. (There is one lock he particularly enjoys playing with because it never grows enough to be tucked back. It often annoys his lover, but he adores that stray curl.) Soft cheeks, tinted rosy during the chilly winters, a healthy tan when summer sweeps in. Lips softer and more colorful than a rose. Dimples. They appear and he's tripping in love all over, stumbling after his lover's affection just to see the two indentations on the side of his mouth.

His body is a masterpiece, graceful and as elegant as a star. Tony adores subtle, enjoys the fine curve of his paramour's neck, takes pride in making shapely thighs tremble beneath his worshipful mouth, is set on fire when the sweetest sighs and loveliest moans slip from bruised lips. All he needs in this life is to bring happiness to his companion. And, he supposes, he has, so death won't be a complete tragedy. Although, Tony would have liked to see his beloved's eyes one last time. They shone like amber, like the heady drink the humans call whiskey.

Once, when he was shy and his darling was unsure of his intentions, he had blurted out a confession under an apple tree, words spilling, spilling, going so fast that breath abandoned his chest.

"Your eyes are like star fire. Like the sun left the sky to shine inside you. It's amazing, something so beautiful I can believe in life again. How could I not when someone as lovely as you exists so gracefully?"

They had stood there, tree branches creaking overhead, leaves drifting down slowly and bees sluggishly swimming through the air in search of flowers and the ichor of life. His companion had blinked at him and then smiled, slow and sweet and pure. Whatever breath remained in his lungs was stolen, vanished without a trace. Tony had been a goner ever since.

He thinks of that time now and discovers that he is not afraid of death. After all, his lover could simply visit him in the fields of the dead, what, with being the Angel of Death, and everything.

The hydra leans back, prepares the killing blow and he thinks, Peter.

A whisper of movement, the growl of the beast; he's ready, he's going to meet his fate head on and not falter and-

A warm hand scoops him up. He tentatively opens his eyes, is met by a bleary pair much prettier than those this body has. There is amusement there, tangled with fondness and love. It's such a beautiful sight that he melts, sinks deeper into the cradle holding him up to Peter's pillow marked face. He always had a thing for his lover's hands; they could kill with just a hint of touch, but they only ever brought Tony to life.

"Anthony," oh, to hear that teasing sigh, to be given the gift of that music, "did you forget you were in your snake body again?"

Embarrassed, he dips his head, agile tongue flickering into the air to taste Peter's affection as a distraction from the flush valiantly trying to survive in his cool cheeks. The angel before him giggles, grins at him before stroking his scaly head gently.

"You forgot about your body and the fact that Milos here is, like, three inches smaller than you when you stand up?" Tony grumbles, slithers across Peter's wrist and forearm. His lover just sighs, rolls over in bed and lets him travel all the way up to the base of a long neck. He loves Peter's entire body, of course, but this is the perfect spot to settle into while he's in this form. Lightly, because it's rude to tease him, goddammit, he's the fallen angel, not a stable boy, he nips at Peter's hair, pulls at a few strands until Peter halfheartedly swats at him.

"Just because I can revive you doesn't mean I won't kill you, Tones. I've got a hundred," his beloved yawns, drags a blanket over the both of them, "and fifty four souls to pick up in the afternoon. I can squeeze you in among them and nobody would know." A lie, obviously. His best friend James would know. The rest is true, Peter would kill him if he called on him again while it was nap time, even if it was an accident.

Thing is, now that Milos is brooding in the corner of the bedchamber and some good ten feet away from him, Tony has no need to call on his angel. Why would he, when he's right by his side? Just as he always has. Just as he always will.

With snake lives saved and fates changed, the first fallen angel and the Angel of Death fall into a deep slumber; tail and hands wrapped around each other, as it should be.

#starker #peter parker x tony stark #peter x tony #angel!peter #fallen angel!tony #sweet and fluffy yall #sophie writes #i need to at least write one #snake!tony #for the giggles

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jaedore · 4 years ago

Text

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 | 𝐭𝐰𝐨

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: jaehyun x reader

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: mythology!au, romance, loads of angst, smut (future chapters)

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, violence (choking) -if you are uncomfortable with these themes then i highly suggest you no longer interact!

𝐚/𝐧: IM TRYING AGAIN SO LETS SEE HOW IT GOES OR I MIGHT CRY. as always, italicized text are thoughts/emphases (you’ll know)

[ 7.5 k words ]

You huff, rolling your eyes as you walk out of the room. You hated everything about Jaehyun, his stupid ego, his stupid face, his stupid hair, everything. It was like he was made to hate everyone, including you.

“Hey!” you recognize Mark’s voice, making you snap your head up from the ground.

“Hey, Mark,” you thinned your lips.

“You okay?” he noticed you clutching your arm.

“I’m fine.”

“Wanna go practice then?” Mark raised a brow at you.

“Well since Jaehyun ruined my chance to, why not?” you painted a disguised look on your face by just the name of the so-called male.

Certainly surprised, Mark’s head slightly jolted back, “Jaehyun’s...practicing?” it was rare for the hot-headed male to practice in his free time, so when Mark heard it he didn’t know how to take it.

“Yeah,” you roll your eyes, “with Aera. Do what you want with that information. I’ll be waiting for you outside.”

Your footsteps were synchronous with Mark’s as he walked to the dagger room and you, to wait outside for him. Before you could open the door, you heard Mark scold Jaehyun and you couldn’t stop the smirk from growing on your lips.

You sat on one of the rocks that decorated the entrance as you waited for Mark, no one was here this early yet so everything was nice and peaceful. The birds chirped among the green trees spring provided, you were thankful that the training center was in the middle of the woods, it was far from the busy life on Mount Olympus. Far from the noise, the chaos, the rules, and the pressure of living a life as a child of a god/goddess.

It only took a few minutes before you heard the door swing open, you snap your head expecting to see Mark, but instead see Jaehyun storming out with his hands clenched in fists. You avoid eye-contact, your eyes growing big at the realization of what you may have just caused. You can hear Jaehyun mumble something from his lips, but you’re too timid to listen closely. Once you see his figure stomp off into the woods, you glance up to see Mark’s forehead creased and his arms crossed in front of him.

“Is he always so hateful towards you?” he chirps up, both of your eyes glued to the back of Jaehyun. You shrug as Mark passes you towards the clearing of the waterfall where you two usually practice.

“Seems like he’s always got something to hate,” you follow your friend into the woods, the narrow trail of dirt small enough for only the two of you.

“I wonder if Hades is like that too,” he whispers in thought.

No, he’s not, you thought to yourself. You remember last night’s event, the kind smile adorned his father’s face as his calm voice could lull you to sleep. At first glance, no one would think that he was the king of the underworld. Curiosity sits on your shoulders as you think how different the two are.

“What’d you even say to him?” you glance at the mud that splatters on your boot.

“I just told him that this is a room to train, not flirt.”

You sigh and shake your head, “Mark, that’s exactly what I said to Jaehyun too. Now he knows that I’m the one who told you.”

“Maybe that’s why he was so mad,” you could see him cock his head to the side.

You scoff at his oblivious remark, “Yeah, no shit, Mark.”

After a few more steps, the clearing to the azure waterfall and rocky boulders painted the scene in front of you and Mark bringing you both peace of mind. A feeling of relief washed over you, making you forget all the pressure and hate in the world.

Taking notice of the tenseness in your shoulder escaping with your breath, he whispers, “don’t worry, he’s probably just like that. I wouldn’t take it personally.”

“I know,” you thinned your lips. Of course, you knew that Jaehyun had something against everyone, but why did it feel like it was just against you? And why did you care so much?

With sore muscles and bruised fists, you and Mark were side by side walking back to the training center where all the students began to pour in for their daily lessons. The chattering of students became louder as you two got closer.

You and Mark were in the middle of talking when a tall man ran next to you, the smell of him immediately giving away who he was.

“Hey, Y/N!”

You turn your head to see Lucas, son of Psyche, Goddess of Soul, and Compassion, with a beaming smile shining at you. You couldn’t help but greet him back with your biggest smile and a little laugh because of the trance he had on you. Lucas is always happy, he’s always kind and spreading his love around to others making sure they were happy. He was like the water on a hot day.

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Mark whispered to you, giving you raised, yet suggestive brows. You scowl at him for him almost being obvious, but Lucas’s laughter pulled your attention.

“Where’d you two go?” he asked.

“We just went for a walk,” you replied, being completely aware of the white lie you just told. It just wouldn’t be fair for him and others to find out that you were getting private lessons with Mark.

“Cool, cool, you two are close?”

Your gaze from the ground pulls your eyes to Lucas’s, it’s filled with wonder, curiosity, and a bit of hope, “yeah, we’re just good friends.”

“Friends,” Lucas laughs, it rings in your ear, the lovely sound of him expressing amusement lifts the corner of your lips, “well, then...do you wanna grab lunch together today? I know a place where we can eat, too-” he leans closer to you, “-plus, it’s better than the cafeteria.”

You chuckle a bit, raising a brow because you were not expecting him to ask you out for lunch, “like a date?”

Lucas nodded, “Yeah, you can call it that.”

Immediate heat rose to your cheeks, making your heart thump a little faster and constricting your throat, “y-yeah, we can do that.”

“Great, I’ll see you later then,” Lucas lightly punches your arm and runs to catch up with another friend and as you watch him go, your eyes follow his path and cross Jaehyun.

Your jaw clenches at the male as he sends fire bullets to your chest, your entire body tenses up that you run to the opposite entrance to avoid him. You shut the doors behind you with a gulp, but the second you turn around, a dark aura settles in your bones.

Dressed in dark leather and a cold stare, Jaehyun stands before you, his presence bringing the entire world down with him. “Was my father at your house last night?”

You inhaled a drawn-out breath at his question, almost wanting to just ignore it and walk past him, but something in your mind stops you from doing so. “Yes.”

Jaehyun narrows his eyes at you, the eyes that are sharp as a knife and could cut you at a glance, “why?”

“I don’t know Jaehyun, he was there before I got home. All I knew was that he needed to talk to my mother,” you reply as you find the courage to move past him, but as you did, you could sense the suspicious demeanor sitting on his shoulders, “don’t worry, it had something to do with the affairs of Olympus.”

“You don’t know that,” you stop in your tracks and turn back around, viewing his back.

“Yes, I do, Jaehyun. They wouldn’t tell me anything, so I’m pretty sure something’s going on, not between them, but on Olympus,” you reassure him, hesitating to put your hand on his shoulder.

No one knows the relationship between him and his father, the only thing everyone knew was that it was a tense relationship. Cautiously, you set your hand on his shoulder to relieve him. His sturdy shoulders that felt like they were holding up the entire world, slightly slumped, relaxing in your touch. You thinned your lips, thankful that at least part of him trusted you, but it only resulted in him snapping around to clutch your arm, the same arm that he grasped yesterday that had turned to hues of blue and red. You gasp at the solid grip he had on you, the pain from your bruise coming back as he tightened it. Your eyes widened at his dark orbs, making you feel timid and weak in his stare.

Jaehyun pulled you close to his chest, his strong muscles against your forearm and the smell of ashes, musk, and spice wafting to your nose. With the tiny time, you had to glance at him, his sharp features allured you to stare, even more, he was so beautiful up close. His skin was pale as the winter snow, yet his lips were as red as the cherry blossoms in the spring, everything about him hypnotized you that you didn’t even notice him lowering his head to your gaze.

“Look at me,” Jaehyun’s voice is low, almost quiet but still powerful, “I told you to never touch me again,” his voice is poison to your ears that injects fear in your veins.

You winced as you felt him tighten his hold a little bit more, but you managed to push him away from you, his grip easily slipping off like butter.

“Then don’t touch me either,” your brows creased at him before you turned on your heel to walk back to where everyone else was.

You could feel his gaze burning through your back, but you couldn’t help but turn back and see him staring right back into your soul. So you quickly walked until you saw civilization again, the buzz of lower-class students and the sounds of lockers slamming.

“Hey, where’d you go?” Mark came up behind you, making you jump.

“I-I uh, nowhere, it doesn’t matter,” you huff.

Behind you, Jaehyun turned from the corner you came out of, which sent questions out of Mark’s mouth. Such as, why you came out of the same place Jaehyun did if you were walking to him, what he had to say, etc. but you only shooed him off, picking up your pace to walk to the hand-to-hand combat room.

As much as you tried avoiding Jaehyun, the thought of him was engraved on the inside of your head. It didn’t help that since you two were in the same rankings, you’d have to train with him. Rank A, only for the best. When you found out Jaehyun was in the same class rank as you, you couldn’t help but feel a bitter taste on the tip of your tongue. You knew he was going to be trouble from the beginning.

“Um..okay, you okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine Mark,” you huff at his question and he gets the signal that you no longer wanted to talk about it. That’s how you always were, you always brushed your problems to the side, and Mark’s afraid that one day, they might pile up so high on your shoulders that you’d combust and destroy yourself.

Nonetheless, Mark hums, glancing at how you purse your lips forcefully, “if you say so. What did Lucas have to say to you?”

Like the only light bulb in the only room, your eyes immediately lit up to the male’s name, “he asked me if I wanted to grab lunch with him and eat somewhere else...with just the two of us,” you thin your lips and fiddle with your fingers, even the thought of Lucas made you happy. A sudden outburst of Mark’s laughter makes you snap your thoughts to reality so you slap his arm at his lack of seriousness, “what’s so funny?”

“Nothing,” Mark clutches his stomach, his other hand shielding himself from you, “it’s just weird seeing you act this way because of some boy.”

“He’s not just some boy,” you narrow your eyes at Mark, “he’s Lucas,” you giggle, your eyes closing in innocence.

“I guess I shouldn’t say ‘weird’. It’s different, but it’s a good different, I guess,” he shrugs and walks towards the arena because it’s almost time for training.

“You guess?” you run after him.

“Yeah,” his voice raises in reassurance as he opens the door, the smell of iron protruding the air and the feeling of cement on the heels of your feet.

You slightly pout your lips and blink in your thoughts, are you really that intense that you never showed any sort of happy emotion? You never focused on anything else other than training and perfecting your skills, but now that you have, a new feeling settles on your heart.

“Don’t think about it so much,” Mark nudges you and walks ahead of you to talk to the other trainers.

You watch him jog up to the others, soaking in what he said, but it spills out of your head the second you feel a hard push on your shoulder from the person behind you. Turning your head, the person who shoved you was no one other than Jung Jaehyun, he doesn’t even look back at you as he passes you, but you give him a dirty look and inhale a sharp breath. The things he does to test your patience.

“Asshat.”

It’s only a few minutes until the other students in your ranking pour in, it’s a small group, but it’s a proud group because everyone had to train endlessly to get to the top rank. There are a few new faces, but most of the students are ones you’ve seen for a while, you nod to greet them as they all step in and stand behind you. As expected, it doesn't take too long when you begin hearing whispers from them.

“Jaehyun’s in the top group?”

“How did he make it?”

“Is he really that good?”

“Hades probably bought him his rank.”

“Or he’s just really good.”

“Yeah, he’s really attractive too.”

You roll your eyes, but immediately catch Jaehyun’s stare. You hold his gaze raising a brow and mouthing “what?” to him because it seems like at this point, he’s just looking at you to look at you. Jaehyun peels his eyes from you to look at the other students, greeting them also. The gesture is kind, his lips thinned, not lifted, but his demeanor changes and it disgusts you.

“I know! Do you think he’s talking to anyone?”

You exhale a scoff, your tongue poking out from the inside of your cheek as you turn your head, “we’re here to train. You’ve made it this far, so if your mind is still focused on catching someone’s attention, go to the Aquatic then,” your whisper is sharp, almost on the brink of cruelness.

You didn’t have time to train with others who didn’t take training seriously, if they didn’t and were focused on other things, you urged them to leave. In this case, you suggested they leave for the famous club on Mount Olympus, Aquatic, since their mind is focused on catching someone’s eye, specifically Jaehyun’s. He’s not even that great, he’s an ass.

“Alright everyone, we’re gonna start,” Mark claps his hand, gaining attention from everyone.

“Newbies, welcome, this is going to be your first day in hell,” one of the other trainers said, earning a slap in the arm from Mark.

“No, it’s not, but we will be training you to be the best. Your limits will be pushed and you might cry, but we’re only trying to make you the best of the best,” Mark explains, eyeing his peer.

“If your mind isn’t in this training room right now, then I suggest you leave or else this will be a very, very long 4 hours,” a smirk grows on the other trainer, you can’t help but mentally laugh because of how he’s trying to explain this process by scaring the newcomers. You can see the slight fear and nervousness in their eyes.

“So that being said,” Mark claps his hands again, “we’ll be testing where your skills are. You’ll be paired up with someone who’s already been training on this team for years and will be required to fight them in front of us. We just want to see where you are and if you have potential in this rank.”

“And if we don’t?” One of the girls behind you speaks up, everyone’s head turning towards you.

“Then you get demoted to the ranking before this one. As in, you go back into your old ranking group until we see that you’re ready to join,” you turn your head and reply to the girl, you raise your eyebrow at her for her lack of focus from before.

“Just as Y/N said,” Mark responds.

“Then why recruit us?” She asks.

“You’ve scored well in your old ranks, which has gained you access to this ranking group, but we have to see if you’re good enough or have the potential to train with us. We have to see if you blend in well,” a female trainer adds.

“To see if we’re good enough?” the newcomer doesn’t stop with her questions as she repeats the female trainer’s latest comment.

“Look,” you turn until you’re completely facing her, “if you want to be here so bad, then shut your mouth and stop wasting time. Focus on training and getting better instead of asking questions about your own abilities, which you should know about unless you’re actually not as good as you seem.” You tilt your head when the corner of your lip lifts into a smirk, you don’t mean to be intimidating, but she’s wasting everyone’s time.

The newbie flashes you a distasteful scoff but glances back up at the trainers who also seem to be on your side. If you heard correctly, you thought you heard Jaehyun chuckle, but you ignore it when you see the narrowness of his eyes.

“She’s right,” the female trainer defends you, clapping her hands to end the discussion and to start training, “okay, we’re gonna pair you guys up now.”

Name after name was called until it was just you and the new girl who couldn’t keep her trap shut. She had a mouth, but did she have the skills?

“Newbie, you’re with Y/N,” the second you heard your name, your lips pressed together, an impatient sigh escaping your nose.

“Come on, let’s go,” you don’t glance at her as you lead her to the area you’d usually warm up to train, “as you probably already know, I’m Y/N.”

“Maeve,” it’s a pretty name, you’ll give her that, but she says it quietly, timidly, contradicting the time she had just opened her mouth to the most respectable trainers.

Her heavy steps are heard as she follows you, both of your frustrated auras tainting the air surrounding you two. Once you get to your spot, you begin jogging wall to wall to get yourself warmed up while she begins stretching. You raised a brow at her, but didn’t think too much of it, you needed to get focused because no matter what skill level she was at, both of you had something to learn from this. You ran, jogged, did some push-ups and sit-ups before you heard the faint name of Jaehyun’s get called. You glanced up to see he was paired up with one of the male newcomers, who was almost as tall as Jaehyun, but not as lean as him. When they walked up, the newcomer walked as if he possessed a sense of confidence, like he knew he was going to beat Jaehyun. Nonsense, you mentally scoff to yourself as you eyed him.

When Mark blew the whistle, the newcomer proved you wrong, he was doing certainly well with his sharp tactics and blocking defenses. You had a feeling of what Jaehyun was doing, it’s something you do too, he was waiting for the newbie to use all of their energy before attacking them. A corner of your lips slowly lifts when you are deemed correct. As the newcomer begins to stumble, Jaehyun goes for the male, immediately punching his jaw, then his rib. The newcomer trips over his own feet and-

“You got a thing for him or something?” Maeve questioned you.

“Who- Jaehyun?” you scan her up and down, she holds a smirk on her lips as she’s in a runner’s lunge. She’s dressed in the regular uniform but dressed it in her style, which you hate to admit, looked good.

“Yeah, you know he and Aera have a thing, right?” she narrows her eyes at you, signifying that you didn’t want to get involved.

“Oh, and is that such a big deal?” you also go into the lunge until you’re at her eye-level, “Please-” you scoff, “-why would I even care to be interested in someone like him?”

She laughs at your remark, but lunges closer to your face attempting to intimidate you, “you think you’re so high up there, huh?”

Your eyes shoot daggers at her, “what are you even talking about?”

“You clearly think that since you’re the daughter of Athena, you think that you’re so good, so high up there, better than everyone else when we all know that you’re not. That this-” she points her finger up and down at your figure, “is just a show. You’re not as good as you think you are, as everyone sees you as.”

You stand up, eyeing her figure that stretches below you, “what are you trying to do? Provoke me?”

The newcomer with apparently a big ego now, stands up and gives you the same dirty expression you’re giving her, “What if I am?”

“Y/N, newbie, you’re up now!” Mark yells at you two.

You throw a smirk at her, “well consider myself provoked. Get ready for it,” you raise a brow and nudge your shoulder with her’s as you walk past her to the ring.

Passing by Mark, you flash him a prideful smile, but he clutches your arm before you could even pass him, “be gentle.”

You scoff, “don’t worry, she’ll get what she asked for.”

Mark only shakes his head as he leads the two of you to the ring. You and the newcomer both glare at each other, her with hate and you with amusement. It only takes three whistle blows until you two begin in your fighting stance. She’s quick and sharp in her movements as she attempts to throw a jab at you, but you’re faster at defending yourself. You have more force to your movements, so you punch her back, immediately coming in contact with her cheek. The newcomer spits out the blood that spills from the corner of her lip and while she’s distracted, you roundhouse kick the side of her face anticipating the sound of her body thumping the ground.

You stand and wait for her to get up and fight you, but she doesn’t. The next thing you knew, you felt contact with her feet against yours, she swung them under you, making you fall on your back, which results in you roughly falling on your back. Your breathing stutters as your chest heaves, but the next thing you knew, her hands made contact with your neck and she didn’t even show you mercy when she rapidly began to tighten her grasp on you. Your eyes widen as your passageway to air is blocked, you begin to thrash your limbs, hitting everything you could as stars begin to blanket your vision. Every second in your hold comes with a constricting pain, releasing almost every kind of worry in your head. You swore you almost saw her eyes turn black when she saw your struggle.

You can hear the shouts of trainers and chaos around you swirling through blurred vision. Everything was faint but you knew the person who managed to get the girl off of you. He lifted you onto your feet, with his arms wrapping around your limp body, knowing that you needed oxygen in your brain and blood back in your veins.

“It’s okay, I got you, I got you. You’re gonna be okay,” Jaehyun whispers in your ear, your head falling against his chest, your eyes slowly opening and closing each second as he strives to keep you standing. Each and every inhale you take is a sting to your throat, the constricting muscles feeling like they’re on fire.

“Let go of me,” you murmur through a hushed tone, weakly trying to push yourself away from him.

“Stop fighting me, let me help you,” he grunts as your body rejects any kind of his physical support.

“I don’t-” you cough, “-need...your help.”

“Shut up,” he mumbles into your ear, eyeing the trainers trying to get a hold of the newcomer who choked you.

You clutch onto Jaehyun’s arm as you glance back. Your vision is slowly returning but you can still see black in her eyes and the veins of her neck, every part of her is drowned in fury, chaos, and darkness, more intense than the male who holds you. She struggles in the trainers’ hold, the growls and screams of outrage screeching your ear.

With a wheeze, you shut your eyes at her piercing shriek, “just get me the hell out of here.”

Jaehyun does just that, he holds onto your shoulders but makes sure you’re still supported as he leads you to the infirmary. He can hear your stuttering breaths and tiny coughs. You bring your hand up to your neck, massaging the bruises and pain.

“I can walk myself,” you grumble under your breath, which is literally just your raspy voice now.

“Fine,” Jaehyun immediately lets go of you, giving you a slight push as he leaves you be, but it only leads you to fall on your knees and your palms stopping you from face planting.

You violently cough, your body still weak and slow in gaining air and strength. Glancing up at Jaehyun, he eyes you with a smug look, orbs filled with brutality. He knows that you clearly need help, your trembling breaths are begging for it but you don’t plead for his help. The last thing you want to do is ask for his help, along with being seen as weak and helpless, you didn’t want anyone’s pity.

You hear Jaehyun sighing at your crouched figure and your hand that clutches your chest, “that’s what I thought,” the taps of his feet become louder the closer he gets to you.

This time, he briskly lifts you into his arms with his hard chest against your arm. The steady bounce in his steps has your arm feeling the muscles of him, your hand fumbling with the fabric of your uniform on top of your chest. You try your best to hide the slight blush in your cheeks by looking somewhere else but your eyes land on his neck. Adorned with fine black ink into the image of a creature, it stares back at you as you admire the art that lays on his soft skin. If it wasn’t for the vile creature that stamped his neck, you would’ve perceived the artwork as fragile as an ancient vase of Olympus.

Jaehyun spares you a glance and sneers at you, “got enough air in your head, yet?”

You gulp and blink elsewhere, “yes.”

Jaehyun kicks open the door to the infirmary and lays you on the bed, “great. Now you owe me,” and proceeds to leave.

“Oh my gosh, what happened to you?” Kun’s eyes widen into space planets.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” you hush him, your voice still strained.

Kun thins his lips and tends to your care. He’s gentle and careful in adding ointment on your neck, fully aware of how sensitive you are, “you probably won’t be able to speak loudly for the next couple of days, but give it time. Your throat needs to rest, so take it easy, alright?”

You nod, sucking your bottom lip as you raise your neck for more exposure, hoping that you were making his job easier. The taunting memories of what just happened come fully back in your mind, the image of the newcomer’s black eyes and veins flashes across your brain, making you gasp and jolt away from Kun’s hold.

“Did that hurt? I’m sorry!”

You softly shake your head, “no, no...sorry, I was just thinking.”

Kun peers up at you, “wanna talk about it?” You sit on the cot, contemplating your next question, but he can tell that it slightly troubles you like a phantom itch, “we don’t have to.”

“Do you know who Maeve is?” you whisper gently, but your hand grips your knee to distract yourself from the pain.

“Maeve?” his forehead creases in wonder, his mind trying to recollect any faint memory of the name, but he shakes his head, “no, I don’t think I’ve heard of her.”

You hum at his response, it was usual for you to not know everyone that attended the training center. Those who enrolled were children of the gods/goddesses, demigods, and even children of those who had the faintest amount of power that flowed through their veins. Even if you could, no one was allowed to ask or look up the background of another student, no matter how well known they already were, it was one of the morals held at the center.

“Why?”

“She’s the one who caused this. Just wanted to know what she holds,” you respond, referring to her power, knowing who her birth giver was would be super beneficial.

“Oh? And what would you do with that information?”

“Use it for it’s good.”

Seems like I’m getting eaten alive more and more as I get near Jaehyun. You rub your neck, the cloth softly sticking to the ointment that Kun had just put on. He let you lay down for the time being until you were stable enough to finally be on your own and since you couldn’t talk, you listened to Kun’s rambling on his studies of the human beings that live on Earth. You had to stop him mid-sentence because you had a lunch date.

“Y/N!” your eyes snap up at the call of your name from your favorite person. Lucas, like the fresh breath of air you needed, ran to you with his big smile, gums showing his enthusiasm, and both of your lunches in his hands.

“Lucas,” you smile, your voice cracking at the male, you quickly clear your throat in the gentlest way possible as he sets a bowl of soup in your hand.

“Hi,” he huffs, “I heard what happened, so I bought you soup instead of a sandwich,” Lucas lightly nudges your arm towards the door that leads outside, assuming that’s where he plans to take you.

You stay quiet and shy when you follow him, a little too nervous to converse. The gravel beneath your scuffing feet turns into grass and then into leaves, the crunch filling up the silence between you two.

“So who’s the culprit?”

“Maeve,” your jaw tenses up when her name slips bitterly from your lips.

Lucas inhales a sharp breath, his head tilting to the side to think, “Never heard of her.”

“You don’t want to,” you mumble under your breath.

When you can hear the familiar sound of a waterfall and the crisp smell it brings, you quietly laugh to yourself as your head shakes. Disappointment taints your laughter when you wonder how Lucas found out about this place.

“It’s so pretty, isn’t it?”

“Yeah...how did you find this place?” You ask, your hand brushing against the branch that always blocks your way as you come in.

“Just a little exploring in my free time,” Lucas follows closely behind you, “come, let’s sit here.”

He leads you to the perfectly sized rocks, little does he know that you and Mark usually sit on it after your private training. He offers to open your container of soup and you let him, being the gentleman he is. Something about Lucas makes you feel at ease like he’s the four-leaf clover that can overturn the back luck that’s been happening. His laughter that soundwaves to your ears widens the smile on your face, he makes you laugh like no one’s ever made you.

You two spend time sitting on the rocks, you slurping your soup and him chewing away his sandwich as you both peer at the waterfall. With the little time you two have, it doesn’t stop him from sprinkling his little jokes from time to time, growing a smile on your face in doing so. You can’t help but feel so blissful when you’re with him, everything about him is so happy and compassionate, it’s easier to say so since he’s the child of Psyche.

“You okay?” abruptly, Lucas asks you in the middle of clutching your stomach from laughing so much.

“Yeah, why do you ask?”

“I don’t know, I’ve just never seen you laugh this much,” he shrugs, crumpling the plastic wrap of his finished sandwich.

“Maybe no one’s made me laugh this much before,” you manage to calm down, your voice returning to a quiet tone.

A pleasant smile expands Lucas’s lips, his eyes glimmer almost reflecting the waterfall and he leans in closer to you, “May I?”

You chuckle at his politeness, a part of you pleased that he had these kinds of manners, “of course.”

Gently, you felt his hands caress your jaw, and leans in closer to you, closing the gap between your lips. It’s slow, with a hint of playfulness, though he’s so careful with you that you can’t help but melt in his embrace. He makes up all of the bad luck that’s happened this week. The plumpness of Lucas’s lips left you craving for more and more, your hands resting on his chest as his hands wrapped around your waist.

“You don’t know how long I’ve waited to do that,” Lucas whispers as he pulls away from you.

“Should’ve done it sooner,” your eyes scanned his lips up to his eyes.

You’ve known Lucas for a couple of years, your mother and his are pretty good friends, so you’d see him around at some of the gatherings his mother would host. He was a little boy when you first met him, but you’d always see him playing in the mud with some of the other kids while you sat with your mother. The moment you knew that you had feelings for him was that time when you two were still young and other kids were making fun of you for not being like other girls, a lot of the kids were afraid of becoming your friend because you were good at defending at yourself, they’d think that you’d hit them, so they distanced themselves from you. Until, Lucas stood up for you and just said that you’re just like them, just good at fighting. You will never forget the smile he flashed you when he said those words, even if they don’t sound deep and serious, it meant everything to you as a child, and now.

Like a gentleman, Lucas let you finish your lunch slowly until you two trekked back to the training center. Since it was a Friday, training was a little more laid back in the second half of the day.

“Will you be going to the bonfire tonight?” he asks you, offering to grab your bowl.

“Yeah,” you turn your head to him as the leaves turn into gravel again, “you?”

“Of course, I’d never miss a good bonfire,” he gently nudges you, but before he can speak Marks walks up to the two of you.

“Mark.”

“I’ll see you later?” Lucas whispers, you nod to see him leave you and Mark alone.

“What’s up?”

“She’s calmed down if you wanna talk to her,” Mark lowers his gaze to your neck.

“I really don’t wanna talk to that bitch right now,” your eyes deadpan to elsewhere.

“Fine, then do you wanna see her?”

Your eyes switch back to Mark in curiosity, “does she still look the same?”

“A bit, she’s calmed down though.”

“Okay,” you inhale careful breath, “let’s go then.”

You follow Mark into the interrogation room where she sits alone, isolated in the cement walls. Mark opens the door to the other room, where you can see her but she can’t see you. In it, you find Jaehyun standing with his arms crossed as he observes her, his forehead creasing with wonder because he’s never seen anyone like this before.

“What is he doing here?” you whisper to Mark.

Apparently, you weren’t as quiet as you thought, “If there’s anyone that knows anything about hatred, it’s going to be me,” Jaehyun answers you, but doesn’t give you a glance.

You turn to Mark and all he does is just roll his eyes and nod, Jaehyun almost taking the words out of his mouth. You slowly walk up next to Jaehyun who stares at Maeve. Her eyes are still painted black, her veins tainted with black on her neck slowly disappearing, but still visible. Her hands are chained, attached to the metal table that’s drilled into the ground but there’s black smoke that surrounds her, almost as if she’s their master and whatever that smoke is, is her protection.

“So no one knows who her parents are?”

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out,” Jaehyun responds.

“Do you think your dad would know?” you discreetly ask.

“Maybe, maybe not. I only know her name and I doubt that’d be helpful at all,” he shrugs.

“Y/N, when she came onto you, did she look like this too?”

Even the thought of it weakened your knees, but you shoved it deep into your mind with a stinging gulp, “yeah, everything except the smoke,” you can recall almost everything you saw, but another part of you doubts yourself, what if it’s just the lack of oxygen that made me see it falsely at the time?

“Do you think it’s because of something you said to her?” Mark inquired.

“I’m positive, if anything, she’s the one that provoked me,” you look at Maeve, the way both her eyes pools into blackness, it’s haunting and it does nothing but sends chills down your spine and grows goosebumps on your skin.

“I don’t believe you,” Jaehyun chirps and your head snaps to him, “I mean clearly, you did something to piss her off and literally choke you. Everyone knows you have a lurking temper.”

“I didn’t say anything to her Jaehyun,” you sneer.

“Okay, okay guys, let's not start something here,” Mark interrupts Jaehyun before he could even speak. His eyes are still fixed on Maeve, but his head is empty. He has no idea what he’s going to do with her.

You were just about to speak up again until you felt the familiar constricting feeling on your neck again, you clutch onto it but there’s nothing there other than your hands. You look at Maeve from the other side of the window and she’s looking directly at you with a smug look, she can see me, it seems like she holds some kind of power that can be telepathically sent through whatever surface she wants it to penetrate through. Panic settles in your eyes, widening them and you clutch onto anything that you can. Your hands land on Jaehyun’s arm and you grip onto it, catching both his and Mark’s attention. Like before, her grip doesn’t show you any kind of mercy and the pain from before slithers into your skin.

Before your knees go weak, you let out a loud cry, and tears spill from your eyes, but Jaehyun's quick in catching you. You felt as if everything went in slow motion, but nothing was visible to you, the only thing you could see was Jaehyun’s alarmed eyes, his dark orbs begging you to keep fighting. Funny, considering that it never seems like that whenever you encounter him.

“Kill her,” Jaehyun shutters.

“You know I can’t do that,” Mark panics.

“Mark, fucking kill Maeve before she kills Y/N!” Jaehyun shouts at the trainer, his veins swelling from his neck, which results in Mark running to the other room and completely knocking Maeve out of her state.

Mark doesn’t exactly kill because that would be illegal, but he does enough to knock her out and when he does, everything dissolves in the air, the black smoke evaporates and the translucent force falls into the cement, never to be seen. You gasp for air as your body shakes in hysteria, your hands clutching at the fabric that lays on your chest as the painful relief of air slowly comes back to you. You can’t help but become fearful of it coming again and you not making out of it alive.

“It’s okay, you’re okay,” Jaehyun tightens his hold on you, somehow the feeling of it brings you back to Olympus.

You stay in his arms, letting him rock you until you gain enough consciousness to push him away. You support yourself on your elbows before gathering the strength to run out of there, leaving Jaehyun foiled. Running through the walls, you don’t give care to those who look at you with bizarreness or concern, you have to go home, I need to get out of here, I need to get out of here. You repeat it to yourself over and over again until you’re actually out of the training center. Finding the nearest large rock, you plunk on it to attain the sufficient air to go on. After a couple of minutes of staring at the top of trees meeting the blue sky, you slowly stand up to walk towards town. You needed to go visit your mother, Athena.

Everything about the building she works in is luxurious, made in marble, lit with expensive diamond chandeliers, and the smell of champagne wafts to your nose. Each person you pass by gives you a respectable greeting, you do your best to return it in the friendliest way possible. Your mother is the Commander in Chief at Olympus Affairs, she’s in charge of anything that has to do with the welfare of Mount Olympus, given her title of being the goddess of warfare, wisdom, and other affairs.

“Y/N,” your mother shoots from her chair and runs to you, “what happened to your neck?” she glances at the fragility of your neck and winces in concern as she sees hues of reds and purples taint your once smooth skin.

“That’s why I'm here, mother-” you walk to her computer that sits on her desk, “-do you know anyone’s daughter with the name of Maeve?” you begin typing in her database, trying to look for any kind of evidence, proof that you weren’t going crazy.

“Not that I can remember, why? Is she the one who did this to you?”

“Yeah,” you type her name and thousands of results turn up, you’re just thankful that ‘Maeve’ isn’t a common name on Olympus or else you would’ve gotten more, “twice.”

“Oh dear,” your mother cups her mouth in shock, “I need to talk to the center.”

You stop your mother from pulling out your phone, “No, mother stop. Please.”

Your mother gasps in disbelief, “you could’ve died!”

Another gasp rips through the air and this time it’s yours, “Her mother is Eris, who can manipulate shadows,” you whisper the latter, connecting the dots that Maeve must’ve inherited some of her mother’s shadow manipulation abilities. When you don’t hear anything from your mother, you turn to see the colors in her face flush with pallor as she grabs the phone.

“Mother, what’s wrong?” you stand from bending over her desk with furrowed brows. And who is she calling?

“She’s back...this isn’t good...I thought so too...when are you available to talk?... Two days?!? Do you know how serious this is?!?!” you jump from the anger in your mother’s voice, “Fine. I’ll come by then-” your mother looks at you, “-and I’m bringing my daughter with me...Why?...Because she literally almost killed my only daughter you JACKASS!” With that she ends the call and slams her phone on her glass desk, you swore you could feel not only her glass desk crack but the windows behind you two that stretch from the ground to the ceiling.

“Who did you call?” you ask nervously, a bit of you already know the answer but you didn’t want to hear it.

With her hands propped on her hips, your mother replies, “Hades, we’re having dinner at their place in two days.”

#nct imagines #jaehyun imagines #jaehyun angst #jaehyun scenario #jaehyun x reader #jaehyun series #nct 127 imagines #nct au #jaehyun au #jung jaehyun #jaehyun fic #jung jaehyun fic

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mcu-fan-fics-blog · 4 years ago

Text

The Helping Hand

This is a Repost from my Ao3 I wanted to bring it to Tumblr. I hope you like it Its currently 5 chapters I will be uploading the rest throughout the rest of the week.

Word count: 1660 approx

Summary: Y/N Krast Illegitimate Daughter of Tony Stark. Product of an unwanted teen pregnancy. What would Howard Stark be capable of doing to assure his sons future? What will happen when Tony meets our Beautiful, young, genius, rich philanthropist.

Tw: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug use, Drug addiction, Teen Pregnancy. (If there are any I missed please tell me.)

Introduction Ch.1

Ch.2

Back Story

(AU Howard and Maria Stark were not killed by the Winter Soldier.)

Your name is Y/N Krast First Born Daughter of Tony Stark. Sent away by Howard and Maria Stark. You being the result of an unwanted teen pregnancy. You don't know who your mother or father are. Howard Stark secretly kept in contact with you, until he passed.

Howard gave you a comfortable life and a bountiful trust fund that you gained access to on your 18th Birthday also the year he died. You are a Genius having finished college and high school at the same time with a master’s in Computer Engineering with a minor in Biology.

After Howards’ death, you were lost… you decided to help others. Thinking that maybe that would help you feel a semblance of happiness. You went to the one place you knew people needed help Sokovia.

You weren't there for long when you realized that you loved being there. The people and the culture were so welcoming and loving… at least towards you. The people definitely had their reservations, but you didn't mind.

You did as much as you could… you lived a simple life. Gave up the luxury in which you were raised and traded it for a small two-bedroom apartment that you shared with a friend who needed help with the rent. You opened a medical facility it was by no means the best but it could do the job.

You taught people basic medical procedures, not surgery… but everyday accidents and the occasional riot scene. Stitches and patch-up jobs.

"Hey, y/n what do you want me to do with these boxes here?" You look at him confused when you realize what he is holding.

"Umm… just leave them there I want to go through them before I leave." David gives you a fond look as he moves to sit next to you. "It's crazy to hear you say that… It seems like just yesterday you were that fresh-faced kid trying to help people."

You clear your throat as you see where the conversation is heading. "Don't go getting all sentimental on me… not now David." You give David a reassuring smile, but to your luck, he doesn't buy it. Now looking at you more seriously he says "Y/N it’s ok. We all understand why you're leaving, no one is mad or angry, just sad you will be missed around here."

You feel your eyes start to water and you quickly turn away from David trying to hide your tears to no avail. "It's just that I’m going to miss this too." He holds your shoulders and turns you to face him. He holds your face, the tears building in his own eyes, and pulls you into a hug.

"You will always be welcome back, you hear me. Now we are both going to stop crying on the count of 3… and were going to pretend that didn't just happen alright." You nod your head slowly agreeing to the terms you collect yourself. What David and you had is the closest thing either of you had to family. He pulled away slowly but determined.

"Okay, no more sad stuff alright… the town wants to throw you a going-away party. And you can't say no they just want to say goodbye." You sigh a smile slowly forming on your face and agree. After all, it had been two wonderful years in which you found yourself.

You are interrupted when you hear a knock at the door. It was rather startling but you've grown used to it by now. Shortly after the loud bangs, you called knocks you hear the door open and close. "How are my two favorite people in the world doing?"

Vivian or Viv for short. "Just peachy" you reply, hearing her laugh at your snarky reply. "I'm in my room and David went out to get things situated for the party."

"Oh well, I just came here to… well you know say goodbye. You are my best friend and I will not forget what you did for me and for my family."

You walk out of your room wearing black jeans and a leather jacket. "You know I would do it again in a heartbeat." Viv hums disapprovingly trying to play it off buy fails. "You see that's exactly what I'm afraid of. You jumped into that building because you didn't care if you did. As heroic as it might seem it was suicidal and we both know it."

You stumble looking for the words " I umm… I was there's no point in lying, but it's not like that anymore." She nods subtlely but you see it in her eyes she's relieved. You take the "out" and change the subject.

"Come on Viv lighten up it's my last night here and we're missing out on my own party." You nudge her and within seconds you get out of your apartment and into the streets that have seen you grow into the person you now are.

The party was more than you deserved… There were home-cooked meals and homemade desserts. People that you have grown to be acquainted with saying goodbye and wishing you luck. You can't help but thank them all sincerely. Once the party is over you head back home with David taking in the last of your stay here.

Once in your apartment you hesitate but end up calling David to your room. "I don't know if you noticed but I never unpacked this box. It was Howard's stuff." David's eyes open showing his surprise. "The Howard… why didn't you open it."

You sigh not knowing exactly why you didn't "Well we're opening it tonight." You make your way to the box and as if you were a wild animal you ravage the package open not realizing how much you actually wanted to open the box.

As you analyze the things in the box your eyes begin to water. There are pictures and mementos of your greatest moments stored in a single place. There's a picture of when you first met Howard you were 11. You chuckle lightly causing David to Burst out laughing. "I umm… I'm sorry but you were one ugly kid." You playfully slap his arm.

"I was, wasn't I. Howard saved me you know in this picture I had just gotten out of the worst foster home I'd ever been in." You'd never said much about your time in the system so David let you talk. "They would hit us, starve us, and some were even sexually assaulted."

David processes what you had just confessed to him realizing that it's probably not even half of what you've been through. "Howard was my saving grace… I was quite the ugly kid inside and out. I was a kid that had no hope in the world, but Howard changed that."

David collects his thoughts and says "I'd say he did a damn good job you brought hope to everyone here… you know kids here aspire to be like you… you are a great role model." You give him a sincere smile and give him a hug.

"David, I'm going to miss you, but it's time for me to go. Never doubt calling me for anything no matter how big or small. And I hope that you and Viv continue the work in the practice. Also, you know that Viv likes you, give her a chance. I don't want either of you to be alone… be alone together. Also she could help you with the rent of the place." Your say laughing. "Now go to bed and we'll leave early tomorrow."

David chuckles while leaving your room. When you hear his door close you continue looking through the things in the box.

Flashback

"Krast come downstairs there's someone here to see you." You jump up startled and cautiously make your way downstairs. You hear part of a conversation but don't invest yourself. You're too frightened when you get to where you heard voices there is a man standing there.

"Ah, you must be the young Y/N Krast. How are you, I'm Howard." You don't reply but rather look at Mr. Evans who nods ever so slightly giving you your cue. "I’m doing well." He's silent for a moment then continues "I hear you're quite the genius." You simply nod. When Mr. Evans decides to cut in rather tactlessly.

"Well, Mr. Howard is here to take you to a new home." You look at him incredulously then turning to Howard and asking him quite bluntly "Are you adopting me?"

Howard simply says "Not exactly, but you will have a family to care for you." The look in his eyes gives you some reassurance. That same afternoon he took you to "your new home."

You quickly find out what he meant by "Not exactly" while you were living in a better home, you were being raised by employees. Howard would come around every week a couple of times. You both enjoyed each other's company and quickly you grew fond of him.

"Y/N hurry up we're going to be late" Howard yelled "Yup im coming, you know if you'd given more than a couple hours heads up id be ready." Howard only chuckles and let that comment slide. You both knew that was a lie.

End Flashback

The morning went by rather quickly. Now you're on the tarmac waiting for your plane to arrive. David was holding your hand while neither of you mentioned it you could not have been more grateful.

"You go and kill em all. Alright I want to see you in a magazine or something. And don't forget to mention me as the greatest inspiration, your daily motivation, and the drive behind you."

You can only chuckle "Those aren't the words I would use to describe you but you are the best." You jug him and wave him off as you board your plane. You cant help but feel guilty as you're currently lying to everyone you care about, but there's no going back now.

#natasha x y/n #natasha romanoff #reader x avengers #avengers #tony stark #wanda maximoff #pietro maximoff #pepper potts #wanda x reader #steve rogers #fanfic #marvel #chapter

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skylights2000 · 3 years ago

Note

Hey Syler! Your letter did send the first time, but I’m really glad you sent it twice because I accidentally deleted the most recent one, and I was really panicking 😅

I really don’t mind that you used this format again. It’s one of my favorites because I’m a space fanatic. I love stars and planets. I love seeing the different phases of the moon, and which constellations are out depending on the season. Did you know some constellations only show up during winter, while some only show up during summer? Someone told me that recently. Im not too sure if it’s true, but if it is, that’s really cool!

As for my favorite constellation, it’s hard to pick. There’s so many to pick from! My star sign is Cancer, but it feels kind of silly to say that’s my favorite. I used to know the stories behind a lot of constellations, but I’ve forgotten them over the years. I should go look them up again later.

My favorite color is a difficult question, solely because it changes depending on my mood. Right now, it’s yellow!

I absolutely adore baking! You’d think I would love cooking too, but baking is just so much more fun to me. I did make chicken alfredo for my family one time, and it was really good, but that’s probably the only thing I’ve cooked from scratch.

I almost became a baker, well, technically a pastry chef. It was my first choice for my career (other than being a writer). I ended up deciding against it though because it took all the fun out of baking for me. Having someone yell at me about perfect measurements and following the recipe to a T just wasn’t for me.

I recently got a book about how to design and draw video games, and I’m really excited to read it!

Wow, that’s a crazy legend. It’s very interesting though. I’ve never heard of that one before, so thank you for telling me! I honestly don’t think I could settle on one legend to be my favorite. There’s a legend behind the stars Vega and Altair, and that one is one of my favorites. Bear with me because it’s been a long time since I’ve read the exact legend, so I may get a few things wrong.

From what I remember, Vega was celestial princess, a goddess of the sky I believe. She was Immortal, but she was weary because she would live in eternity alone.

One day Altair, a mortal, caught Vega’s eye. She descended from the heavens to greet him, and as they got to know each other, she fell deeply in love. Vega promised Altair that no matter what they would be together in the heavens.

But when Vega’s father found out, he was furious that his daughter had fallen in love with a mere mortal. His anger only grew when he discovered that Vega promised to bring Altair up to the heavens with her.

Vega’s father granted the promise that she made, but there was a cruel twist. The two lovers were placed in the sky as stars. Yet while they were both in the heavens, they were not together. The great Celestial River, (known to us as the Milky Way) separated them.

Yet each year, a bridge of magpies formed across the Celestial River. Though it would only be for one night a year, the two were reunited because Altair dared to travel to her.

The star that represents the bridge is called Deneb, and I’ve always remembered that name because it gives me so much hope. I’ve never been one to believe in Fate, but that legend gives me hope that no matter what happens, good things can prosper and come to fruition. It’s a beautiful story to me.

I hope you’re having a lovely day, and sorry for the late reply! Things have been crazy with the school year starting so soon, and sometimes I forget to check my notifications 😅

See ya soon,

~Madison(◍•ᴗ•◍)❤

PS: Here’s a picture of my dog a few days before he had to be put down. He’s such a cutie 🥰

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problematicfavesareproblematic · 4 years ago

Text

Band of Brothers-

Cute/charming things they say when they walk into a room and see you/you walk into a room and they see you:

Babe:

“oh SHIIIIIT! There’s my BABY! Do you see her, fellas? GodDAMN, I’m a lucky sonofabitch!”

(you blush so hard and are just like Babe, we’re at work stahp it but he dgaf).

It’s embarrassing and always makes Martin glare so imploringly at you that you’ll go over to Babe just to make him be quiet. Because, you know, YOU’RE AT WORK.

This bitch is shameless when it comes to loving on you, having once come to stand next to you when Sink was giving an important announcement and straight-up PINCHED. YOUR. ASS.

how you didn’t yelp is a miracle, and how no one else seemed to notice was equally astounding

(oh, the boys noticed. They kinda shipped it tho, so it was more a matter of hiding their joy).

Needless to say, it only happened the once, something you made Babe swear after you pulled him aside and punched him in the arm.

Don’t worry, you kissed it better.

Roe:

bb boy doesn’t say anything at first,

the smile he saves just for you is playing at his lips as you walk up to meet him, tho.

The moment you’re close enough that he can smell the sweet mint of your gum, he’ll whisper something sweet like “hey you” or “mon amor”, or maybe just your name

(bc let’s be honest, his accent is 10 out of 10 and he could read me the dictionary and I’d still rock an ugly giggle/snort combo).

If it’s a more serious situation, like if you’re hurt oh lordy

he will literally shout your name until either you shout back or someone tells him where you are.

I could see him being a face holder, in the sense that he does it to reassure himself that you’re okay and make sure he has your undivided attention.

Since getting injured in Carentan, you hadn’t been as close to the frontlines as you had been, so when you were needed you are REALLY NEEDED,

and even if he didn’t like it Gene knew you were the best at what you did.

Gene also feels better if he knows where you are.

Even when you eventually return to Easy, he will feel better knowing which Foxhole you’re in, and knowing he’s seen to it your first aid kit was fully stocked.

Liebgott:

THAT FUCKER’S SMIRKING AT YOU SO OPENLY that whoever he had been talking to instantly goes

*sigh* y/n’s just came in, didn’t she?

And he won’t even ANSWER because he’s already shoving past them to walk up and eye you with obvious satisfaction.

“Bout time you showed up,” he’d say casually, hands finding your hips giving them a quick squeeze.

“Sooner we get briefed, sooner we can get outta here.”

(You’re not fully sure what ‘getting outta here’ entails, but if the way he looked at you was any indication, you had a feeling it didn’t involve anything less than PG-13 sexy times.)

Bull:

“Hey, little lady.”

He’ll say it no matter how tall or short you are, how wide or how narrow.

He will always say it to you that when you first see each other in the morning

(sometimes, you wake up to Hey, little lady being kissed into the soft skin behind your ear.)

(Once while on a 48 hour pass, he’d woken you up that way in a REAL bed and the two of you had nearly gotten him sent up Curahee for being late coming back because you’d ended up spending more time in that bed than either of you anticipated Whoops)

(Even if he had been late, he definitely wouldnt have minded, tbh. He fully considered going AWOL if it mean neither of you had to leave the bed)

but throughout the day he’s more concerned about getting his hands on some part of you whenever the two of you had been apart-

even if it was for like five minutes.

Nothing over the top- holding his arm up and out so you can step into his side, a press of his lips to your temple.

Idk guys i just feel like he’d just love you so much that everyone would be able to see, which they do and they all think it’s fucking cute

Buck:

He doesn’t always call out when he sees you, mostly because your eyes always seem to find his.

The two of you could be across a field from one another with a thousand angry Germans between you, guns blazing, and the two of you would always spot each other like two honing beacons.

If its downtime and you guys don’t have to be on your guard he’ll ABSOLUTELY wolf whistle in at you,

You’ll see a stupid grin lighting up his face as he nods in your direction.

“Take a look, boys. I think we’ve got ourselves a…”

and he always waits until you’re close enough that he can wrap a quick arm around your waist and pat your hip.

“Certified babe-asaurus!”

(in a foxhole somewhere, a wild Babe’s head pokes up in confusion).

You groan and boo him, and whoever he was with inevitably ends up booing him too.

But he doesn’t care because seeing you smile makes him so happy you guys.

Lipton:

If you’re in public, he will quietly step up beside you and place his hand gently between your shoulder blades.

He’s not super into PDA, which you didn’t mind because what he didn’t show in physical touch he more than made up for in open admiration.

He is in awe of you

sometimes he worries you forget how highly he thinks of you, how highly everybody thinks of you

(you don’t forget, but he’s just one of those people who will get intrusive thoughts like that and sometimes has a hard time shaking them so plz just let him say it ok?)

so he always whispers some praise with his greeting

(Hey, beautiful...Doin’ okay, love?...What’re you thinking, brilliant girl?).

It’d probably seem like overkill if anyone else did it but Carwood is just so goddamn sincere that you can’t help but duck a quick kiss to his shoulder.

HOWEVER!

If you two kids are alone….

OH BOI.

He is handsy, coming up and caging you with his arms,

probably pulling you close quickly so you lose your balance and he can hold you a lil bit.

(He likes to sweep you off your feet im so sorry)

That’s when his praises are hushed and sighed between long slow kisses.

Nixon:

Like Liebgott, he’s a snarky motherfucker who will get the most self-satisfied grin on his face the moment he sees you, instantly turning on the famous Lewis Nixon charm ( something he’d long since decided belonged to you and you alone.)

“Uh oh,” he’d say, looking you up and down before raising an eyebrow.

(bc your hot but also he doesn’t want to get all flirty if you’re hurt or sick or something’s up bc ur not just something to flirt with- YOU ARE A BADASS WITH BADASS RESPONSIBILITIES AND THAT WAS SOMETHING HE very often and sometimes FOUND SO HOT THAT IT MADE HIM THINK HE MAY HAVE AN AUTHORITY FETISH this has been a PSA)

“Here comes trouble.”

you roll your eyes, the behavior you once found cocky and arrogant having becoming endearing somewhere between Toccoa and England.

He has absolutely no qualms about PDA (verbal or physical), so it’s up to you to reign him in

(especially if he’s a lil tipsy, poor Luz didn’t need to hear Lewis’s sloppy and shameless plea for you to let him eat you out on top of piano he’d found in the attic of the billet he’d been assigned. You weren’t able to look at George for a week without wanting to die of embarrassment and Lewis Nixon didn’t get any for two weeks. He was sure to never make such a mistake ever again)

And Dick had probably grown blind to how Lewis liked to pull you his lap and run his hands up and down your thighs while you played with his hair.

Also, like Lipton, he probably saves the more explicit acts of PDA for when the company has scheduled downtime

(but only bc you told him he needed to keep it in his pants any other time he tried to get cute with you)

but you can bet your ass his hand will always try to tap it (your ass, that is.)at least once

a day when he isn’t supposed to.

That’s when you get to punish him whoopsies

Dick:

since the day you were introduced to Dick in Georgia, the boy always made sure to stand when you entered a room and will call you “ma’am”,

(you know, LIKE HE DOES ONLY BECAUSE HE HAS TO FOR SOBEL BC RANKS. I feel like he has a “we salute the woman, not the rank” speech queued up for anyone who tried to give him shit for it BUT THAT’s JUST ME)

but he has a knowing look in his eye that makes the term ‘ma’am’ feel anything but impersonal.

It confused the shit out of replacements, who would automatically stand because their superior officer (that would be Big Dick Winters) did- only to see you standing there in your fatigues with a coffee in each hand with a look of mutual confusion on your face.

(bc while they like you, but they’re confused still bc while you’re a boss ass bitch, you didn’t outrank him...or at least they theink you dont?)

Babe had been the one to ask you about the longing looks and lingering glances, and when you didn’t know how to answer him you’d gone to Nixon,

He’d burst into tearful laughter and was unable to get it together enough to explain anything.

Dick had been the one to bring it up the next time they were alone, weirdly enough, as she proofread his report for errors that didn’t exist.

Because you warrant it, he’d said when pressed for a reason why he greeted her like a ranking officer, looking down at his boots as they both blushed like teenagers at a school dance.

After that, he still stood wherever you walked in

but now he made a point to brush his fingers against yours at some point during the time you were together.

He’s the definition of a slow burn friends-to-lovers story, and boi can get spicy LEMME TELL YOU.

(this is my first writing thing ever plz let a sister know if there are any glaring typos. Also i’m roughly 97 years late to fandom but I brought y’all some starbucks so plz let me in thank you)

#band of brothers imagine #band of brothers x reader #babe heffron x reader #eugene roe x reader #joe liebgott x reader #bull randleman x reader #carwood lipton x reader #lewis nixon x reader #dick winters x reader #hbo war x reader #it's vv bad but I'll just add it to the pile of already burning garbage pile that is my bibliography #buck compton x reader

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